Page 122 of Pick Me

“Thea.” Jackson tried to interrupt, but I raised my hand, stopping him. He’d been called enough names tonight. It was my turn to protect him.

“Stop trying to defend me. It’s time I owned up to my own reckless behavior. I am the reason for the car swerving off the street. Don’t blame Jackson.”

Tanner pulled his ringing phone out of his pocket, showing me the screen.

Mom Calling.

“They’re worried sick about you. They’re trying to change their flights so they can come here and see you instead of coming for the draft.”

“They don’t need to do that,” I said quickly, realizing just how much I’d fucked up again. This was one of the most important times in Tanner’s life, and here I was, making it about me. He’d never say it, but I knew better.Iwas the problem in this. I always was.

“So, what am I supposed to say?” Tanner asked, making my stomach turn. My parents would find out about my sexcapades, and that was how they would be introduced to Jackson as my boyfriend. There was no way around it now that I’d admitted as much to Tanner.

“Tell them I’m fine, and I’ll call them when I’m back in the apartment. I am going home tonight, right?”

“Thea, where you’re sleeping tonight is the last thing you should be worrying about. You do realize it’s an offense to distract the driver in California, right?”

“I’m not going to press charges,” Jackson answered quickly. He was inching toward me, stopping when Tanner pinned his gaze on to him.

“How can you both be so dense? It doesn’t matter if you don’t press charges. If the cops find out, they’ll charge you anyway. Ever heard of a DUI? You can get one even if you don’t hit someone else.”

Tanner’s phone was flashing incessantly in his hand. I could see all the worry and stress building up within him. He was always trying to protect me even when he had too much on his plate.

“This is a fucking nightmare. I need to speak to Mom, and then I’ll go find a doctor and let them know you’re awake.” He shook his head, moving fast out of the room before bringing the phone to his ear. “Hey, Mom. Yeah, she’s up.” That was all I heard as he turned the corner and walked away from the room.

“I’m glad you’re okay, Thea,” Aster said, breaking the silence. “I’m also glad to hear you two have finally admitted your feelings for one another.” As if that was the most important thing right now. Tanner was pissed, I couldn’t move my shoulder, and Jackson had no car. I’d fucked everything up royally this time. There was no denying that. “Just give Tanner some time. He holds a lot of guilt over that incident in high school. Which caused him to overreact.” The fact she knew that meant he’d talked to her about it. No doubt in great detail, which meant he’d spent more time acknowledging it than I had since it happened. It was all I could think about now. “He’s not angry at you. There’s a lot of other stuff going on, and this just didn’t help his stress levels.”

The draft, Aster issues, his life changing. I didn’t need to add to it, but I did.

“He’ll come around.” Her voice was soft, and there was clear affection for my brother in it. Well, at least they seemed to have made up.

“No. This isn’t on him. He has every right to be upset.” I couldn’t stop thinking about all the times he’d bailed me out over the years. It was too many. I’d put too much on him, and this outburst was proof of that. He deserves someone better. “I’m a fuckup. I’m selfish, and I don’t think about the effect of my actions on others, especially Tanner.”

“Thea.” Jackson’s hand landed on mine, and I gave him a smile out of pity. Reality hit me in that moment. This was how our relationship would be announced to everyone. How pathetically grim but also appropriate for me. I could do nothing normally. When I announced things, it had to be with a crash—no pun intended.

Aster pointed her thumb over her shoulder. “I’m just going to check Tanner’s okay and give you both some time alone.”

When she left the room, it felt strange. Jackson was standing beside the bed, looking down at me. Neither of us knew what to do. I lifted my arm, which seemed to be enough of a signal for him to sit in the chair next to me. My fingers itched to touch him, even though I wasn’t sure he’d dare to. Not while my brother was so upset. It was crazy to think how much I missed his touch when we’d only been dating for a few days.

Finally, he gave into the urge, his hand linking with mind. “You scared the shit out of me there, Pyro,” he murmured. Jackson leaned over, kissing the top of my head, and when our gazes connected, I noticed the glisten in his eyes. It took my breath away. I’d never seen Jackson emotional before, and to know it was over me made me feel terrible.

“I’m sorry.” What else was there to say? He didn’t want me to do it, yet I did.

He nodded, tightening his grip, and leaned his head against my good shoulder. “It’ll be okay. I promise, Pyro.”

Biting my lip, I stared at the wall as I held back the tears. I wish I could believe that. It would not be okay. I’d ruined it for everyone. Tanner. Jackson. My parents. My decisions weren’t just affecting me. They were affecting everyone around me, and I had no idea how to fix it.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Jackson

My pinkie grazed Thea’s as Tanner drove us home. The car was silent, and I was squashed, sitting in the back seat with my head against the window. I didn’t dare look at the girl next to me, in fear of unleashing the wrath of Tanner. Thankfully, Thea only heard the tail end of our argument—if that’s what you could call it since I didn’t fight back—otherwise, she’d be even more upset than she already was. She didn’t need to see her brother like that. She already carried enough guilt.

When I subtly turned my head to see Thea, I couldn’t gauge her expression. She was glaring out the window, no doubt trying to forget everything that happened. The music was on low, and no one had spoken since we’d left the hospital. What was there to say?

“Oh, this is a good song.” Aster broke the silence as she reached over and turned the radio up. As much as I hated Bailey Hill’s sugary pop music, it was better than sitting in the all-consuming silence. Every minute felt like hours, only adding to the guilt I already felt.

Aster subtly looked over her shoulder from the front, giving me a wink before she slouched back into her seat. She was fighting for us, which could only mean she thought Tanner was being unreasonable. He wasn’t. I agreed with him. I’d been an asshole, thinking with my dick instead of my head. We should have told him about us the minute he got back. Hell,Ishould’ve told him the minute I realized my feelings for his sister were more than platonic. He deserved that. I should’ve stopped driving when her hand dropped on my crotch, and I certainly should’ve pulled over before her mouth got anywhere near my dick.

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