Page 30 of Brace and Chase

And then I remember.

“What do you mean he was there yesterday? At the Christmas party?”

He avoids my gaze then, and lets out a big breath.

“What is it?” I demand, getting worried now. Bear has never been one to mince his words.

“There was this whole thing...” He trails off, still not looking at me. I don’t care about his avoidance tactic.

“What thing?” I demand, my tone harder now.

“Ugh,” he says dramatically and throws his head back. “Jules is really worried, man.” He does look at me then, and I stop breathing. “He’s having a really tough time with this bullshit with Charlie, and how it’s affecting the whole team. He thinks he’s the one failing.” His words do nothing for my shocked state but I do take a necessary breath.

“But—”

“But nothing. You know he takes his role as leader of the Pirates very seriously.”

I can only nod because, yeah, I do know that.

“So he was freaking out about planning the Christmas party, I guess. And Sterling put his foot down. He saw Drew, and got Drew and Xander to plan the whole thing for them.”

I nod, following along but wishing he’d talk faster. I’m well aware that Drew and his best friend Xander—who’s also Milkman’s boyfriend—are awesome party planners, although they focus more on weddings.

“You remember how I told you a few weeks back that you were playing Santa this year?” I nod, though he doesn’t wait for an answer.

“It was because Drew told me about this whole plan they had to keep you and Charlie apart during the party so the kids and all the adults with kids could enjoy it. So?—”

“They all came to see me.” I remember like a lightbulb coming alive inside my brain.

“What?” he asks, confused.

“That day. After you told me I was playing Santa. Caroline, Drew, Xander, Chris, and Sterling were all at my place. They were there to convince me to dress up as Santa for the kids.”

“Right.”

I remember that was one of the only times I’d hung out with them this season and regret fills my chest.

God, I’ve wasted a whole damn season with this...

I shouldn’t give my hate for Charlie that much room. I mean, the hate isn’t going away, that’s just not an option,but that doesn’t mean it should be at the forefront of my thoughts all the time. It’s consuming my damn life.

“So they had this schedule.” Bear goes on and now I’m even more lost.

“Schedule?” I demand.

“Yes.” Bear nods earnestly. “To keep Charlie away from the back yard where you were. I wasn’t really too focused on what they were doing last night, but I saw him there. He talked to Mater and Ingrid for a while and looked happy enough.” He shrugs. “And then just as the kids were starting to get sleepy, he said his goodbyes to Jules and Sterling then left.”

I stay silent for a long time, just... processing.

They did all of that so the team could have one nice evening during the holidays. All of that so I wouldn’t throw a childish fucking hissy fit that would ruin everyone’s night.

Fucking hell, I’m such anidiot.

I let my face drop to my hands and shake it roughly.

“Agh,” I shout in frustration, though it’s muffled by my hands.

“Santa,” Bear says softly. I hear the helplessness in that one word.

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