Page 101 of Elora and the Crow

He swallowed heavily, his dark eyes studying hers.

“Tell me,” she whispered.

“Because I love you,” he said. “I didn’t leave because I love you, Elora.”

Happiness flooded her chest, driving away the fear and the dread. “I love you too, Jonah.”

She tried to kiss him, but he pulled back and shook his head. “We can’t be together, Elora.”

“Oh, you do not get to pull that fucking bullshit, Jonah. Not after you just told me you love me.”

“I’m doing this because I love you,” Jonah said.

“No, you’re doing this because you’re afraid,” Elora said. “Your brother has been kidnapped, I nearly died, and you are afraid and overwhelmed with guilt. You’ve convinced yourself this is the right thing to do, and now you’re trying to convince me, but it won’t work. I love you, and I want to be with you, Jonah.”

“I’m not a good person, Elora,” Jonah said.

“You are,” she said.

Sorrow flashed across his face. “I killed my best friend.”

She smoothed her thumbs over his cheekbones. “Tell me why.”

He scoffed angry laughter. “Because I’m a fucking killer, Elora. It’s what I do. Why won’t you accept that?”

“Because you are so much more than that, and I will do everything in my power to make you see that, Jonah,” Elora said. “Tell me what happened.”

“You asked me what I had to do to leave the Academy,” Jonah said. “Killing Diego was my only way out. He was my best friend, and I loved him, but I killed him anyway.”

She waited for him to say more and pressed a kiss against his mouth when he didn’t. “Tell me, honey.”

His voice hoarse, Jonah said, “Diego and I grew up together at the Academy. He was a year older than me, but we were given to the Academy at the same time. He was smart, he was strong, and he was good at his… job. But he hated the Academy as much as I did. He wanted out. Our mistake was trying to leave at the same time.”

He blinked rapidly and swallowed compulsively a few times. “We should have known better. We should have been fucking smarter. But we were both so goddamn tired, and we wanted… we wanted to be free together. You know?”

Elora nodded, stroking Jonah’s face with light brushes of her fingertips.

“The Academy would allow recruits to leave if they did one last job. It was always a fucking nightmare of a job, and the target was usually impossible to kill. But once you asked to leave, that was it. There was no backing out. You had to do the job, and if you failed to kill the target in the allotted time… the Academy killed you.”

“What?” Elora stared at him. “Are you serious? They put all that time and effort into turning you into a killer for them, and then they just kill you themselves?”

“Yes,” Jonah said. “It was designed to keep us compliant, to keep us working for them and dissuade anyone from leaving. Before Diego and I tried to leave, we knew of only four recruits who decided to leave. Only one actually succeeded and got the fuck out. The rest of them failed, and the Academy killed them. But we were cocky and so fucking sure we could do it.”

He lapsed into silence, leaning forward and resting his head on her shoulder. She held him close, rubbing his back and staying quiet until he raised his head and stared solemnly at her.

“Did they make you go after the same target?” Elora asked. “Is that why you had to kill Diego?”

Jonah laughed bitterly. “No. We were each assigned a target and given seventy-two hours to kill them. Diego’s target was me, and mine was Diego.”

“Oh my God,” Elora whispered. “Oh, Jonah, I’m so sorry.”

“Diego was stronger and smarter than me. He should have been the one who lived, but I got fucking lucky.” Jonah’s voice was so dull and lifeless that it sent goosebumps crawling across Elora’s skin. “I got lucky, and Diego died instead of me.”

The pain and sorrow in his gaze made tears slide down her cheeks. His eyes now as dull as his voice, Jonah said, “Do you know what the last thing Diego said to me was?”

She shook her head, the hot tears still splashing down her cheeks.

“He said he loved me.” Jonah’s voice cracked. “He said he loved me, and he was happy I was getting out.”

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