Page 69 of Friends Who Fake It

How would she ever tell anyone that she’d been foolish enough to be drawn into a man like Xavier Salbatore’s seductions?

What a stupid, naïve child she’d been! Time had given her some clarity and she’d been able to see how he’d used her. How he’d seen her as an easy target and seduced her for sport. How she’d meant nothing to him, just as Maria had said. No one would judge her more harshly than she did herself.

“If you won’t tell us, so that we can make him marry you and raise this baby properly, then you will leave our house at once!”

Marry her? She laughed. Not a sound of humour. A deranged sound of pain. She’d refused to tell them his name, and they’d stuck to their threat, giving her ten minutes to pack a bag and then telling her to take her shame far away from them.

She had

And yet she’d agonized over the pregnancy. She’d agonized over whether or not she could keep a baby from someone. On the one hand, he had a whole life that was completely distinct to her. She’d been an aberration for him – a guilty secret he’d never planned to share with another soul. The consequences of that weekend would be unwelcome for him.

He wouldn’t be grateful to her for sweeping in and threatening his relationship, and his life, with this bombshell of a revelation.

And yet…

He was this child’s father. Didn’t he at least have a right to know? Couldn’t he then decide what he wanted to do? If she made it very clear she wanted nothing from him, except to be left alone as much as possible?

Yes, she had to tell him.

And so she’d called his mother, one last time, hating that she had to go through a third party in order to communicate with Xavier.

Maria must have recognized the number, because she answered with a suspicious tone in her voice.

“It’s me. Elizabeth,” Ellie said, just to be sure.

“Yes?” Maria could not be colder nor more unwelcoming if she tried.

“I…”I’m pregnant. Your son’s the father.It shouldn’t be so hard to say.

“I’m glad you called,” Maria rushed to speak first. “It gives me a chance to tell you that I spoke to my son about you.”

Ellie’s heart slammed into her ribcage and a foolish ray of hope slipped into her breast. “Oh?”

“Yes. I was angry at him for cheating – we raised a better man than that! - and so I asked him about you.”

Ellie’s stomach twisted painfully; she gasped and had to sit down. “What did he say?”

“That he was ashamed. Mortified. He said that weekend was just a bit of fun before the wedding; that it was meaningless. Had it not been for the accident he would have made sure you understood that yourself – that you knew it had just been …” Maria cleared her throat. “Sexual.”

The words danced like pinpricks of pain on Ellie’s eyelids.

“He said he regretted it, that he wished he’d never met you. He said if he could have his time again, he would never do anything to hurt Arabella. She means the world to him, as he does to her, so you can see why my husband and I sought to protect him from…”

Ellie squeezed her eyes shut, pain lancing her. “From me,” she finished the sentence, the very idea that she would ever do anything to hurt Xavier. Even now, she couldn’t imagine wishing him ill.

“So whatever fantasies you’re harbouring towards my son, I’m telling you this to save you the embarrassment. It was a foolish indiscretion but now it’s over. Done with. You truly are better to forget he ever existed.” And then, with a slightly softer tone. “I know he’s forgotten all about you.”

She thought about telling Maria anyway. Or forcing her way into Xavier’s life. But to do so would have killed Ellie.

To see him and know that he wished they’d never met, to know that she’d always be a mistake to him. Would he view their son as a mistake? Would he loathe her for ruining his marriage? And wouldn’t she loathe herself anyway?

The wedding photos had cemented it.

She’d googled him and the pictures had popped up, taken from a Spanish street, the sun shining, the woman Ellie recognized from the hospital at his side.

And Ellie had cried, because Xavier looked so different, and so familiar.

His face was in profile, because he was looking at his bride, a smile on his face.

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