Page 52 of The Two Last Moments

I know it’s not the kind of thing where I can snap my fingers and she’s better. I just wish I could do more. It eats me up to see her frustration. I feel like I’m failing her. And this longing I have for her, this craving—that’s where I’m failingmyself. Because I can’t shake it even though I should.

I’ve replayed the kisses we shared in my dreams. Also in my bed while I’m awake, in the shower… I haven’t jerked off to the thought of kissing someone this much since I was a damn teenager.

“I keep waiting for something new to come up in the search for Lark’s identity,” I say. “But weeks have passed, and everything’s led to a dead end.”

Cliff nods. “I know, I’m sorry.”

Angela got the camera footage from the travel stop near Fresno, but it showed nothing useful about the mystery man in the dark SUV. Nor has anyone seen or heard from Kathy Sullivan since she took off. If Lark doesn’t get her memories back, I have no idea how we’ll find the guy who hurt her. I would never stress her or blame her. But she’s the only one with the answers.

I’d much rather go on the offensive to keep her safe. Instead, we’re on defense, waiting for her attacker to make the next move. Lark seems to think that isn’t going to happen.

But I’m not so sure.

“I’m trying to do what’s best for her,” I say. “Put her first. She doesn’t have anybody else who’ll do that.”

“But you want her?” Cliff asks again.

“That doesn’t matter.”

Cliff shakes his head. We both watch Quinn and Lark laugh at something Aiden just said, while he wears his same deadpan expression.

“For what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure she feels the same about you,” Cliff says. “When I mentioned that you and Quinn used to hook up, you should’ve seen the look on Lark’s face.”

“You saidwhat?” My head whips toward my friend. Maybe my former friend, because I can’t believe he said that.

“I didn’t know it was top-secret.”

“Fuck,” I mutter. I don’t want Lark to get the wrong idea about me and Quinn. We had a friends-with-benefits thing a while back, and it was more affectionate than much else. “What else did you tell her?”

“Uh, I may have said something about you hooking up with anything that moves?“ He cringes.

“What the hell, Cliff?”

“That was my bad, I’m sorry. But you don’t want to lie to the girl. If you like each other, what difference should it make?”

I shove my fingers into my hair and groan.

I’ve never been shy with women. I like how soft and sweet they are. I enjoy showing a woman a good time. And it’s true that I don’t usually do relationships. For a long time, I liked my life as it was, and I never felt the urge to change. I saved lives by day and was more than happy to hook up at night. Well, when I wasn’t on shift.

But when Nina got sick, everything changed, whether I wanted it to or not.

And then I met Lark, and my world shifted again.

She’s got me twisted up in a way no woman has before. I have no idea how to answer Cliff’s questions because thingsdofeel different with Lark.

She needs a protector. A friend. Which means Ican’tdo anything about it. Even if this need for her is only getting stronger instead of going away.

I should be happy to see her over there with Quinn and Aiden. She needs more friends around her, not less.

But then Aiden pulls a skewer off the grill, cuts pieces off of it on a cutting board, and holds a chunk of chicken upbetween his fingers. She takes the bitefrom his hand, nodding and smiling.

I grit my teeth and growl.

“You okay over there, bud?” Cliff asks.

No, I’m not. My screws are loosening.

I find myself across the yard and next to the grill. Aiden, Quinn, and Lark all look at me. “Having fun over here?” I ask, my voice sounding testier than I meant it to.

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