Page 84 of Between Hate and Desire

Maddie and Sophie throw out different cute names, and I write a few down in my phone app, but others I pass on. The pizza eventually arrives, and we set the books aside while we move to the kitchen table. As we eat, making small talk, Maddie eventually brings up our parents.

“Do you know when you’re going to tell them?” She looks at me just as Sophie did last week when she asked. Time will eventually run out, we all know it, and I have to decide soon.

“Well, I’ve been thinking about it a lot. Every time I get in the shower, I notice my growing belly, and I won’t be able to cover it up much longer.” Even though we live in different states, they won’t be happy I hid it from them and didn’t tell them right away. The longer I wait, the more disappointed they’ll be.

Hunter gives me a sympathetic smile but doesn’t interrupt.

“I’ve decided to keep my Fourth of July trip and tell them in person and get it over with. I hope they’re not heartless enough to throw me out on my pregnant ass, not after everything I’ve been through this year, but it wouldn’t surprise me.” It hurts my hormonal heart to think about it, but I know it’s something that has to be done. “Plus, it’s too easy to hang up on someone if it’s done over the phone. At least then they’ll have to dismiss me and the baby to my face.”

Once I tell my parents, the entire congregation of the church will know my business in less than a day. I can only imagine the prayer lists I’ll be added to.

“This isn’t going to be good, Lennon. Are you crazy?” Maddie says.

“I know they’ll be highly disappointed and won’t hold back what they think about any of this, but I’m their daughter. They’re supposed to love me unconditionally. They taught us compassion all of our lives.” I pause, collecting my thoughts. “Honestly, I’m fucking scared of their reaction because I don’t want to lose them.”

“I’m going with you,” Hunter speaks up, his eyes not leaving mine. “I’m not going to let you go through that alone. I know I’ve already offered, but I’m not giving you a choice anymore. I want to be there for you.” He crosses his arms over his broad chest and holds his stance as if he’s not giving me any room to argue this.

“You’re insane. You have no idea how stressful and awkward this will be.” I shake my head, turning my body toward him. “I’m already preparing for the worst, and if you’re serious about this, you’ll need to as well. The moment they see my belly and no wedding ring, I’ll be the black sheep of the family. What hurts the most is knowing how disappointed they’ll be when all I’ve ever wanted is to make them proud. They might literally tell me to leave and never come back.”

I’ve been stressed and worried enough about this pregnancy, and while this is a giant hurdle to cross, they deserve to know they’ll be grandparents. Plus, I can’t lie forever. They’d eventually find out. My emotions take hold when I think about what could happen. Sophie and Maddie look back and forth between us.

“I wish I could go with you.” Maddie takes my hand. “I can’t because of my show. I’m so sorry.”

I wipe a rogue tear that spills over. I hate that I’m crying right now, but the more I think about it, the more upset I become. Telling them they’re going to be grandparents shouldn’t cause me this much stress.

“I’ll try to get out of rehearsal, Lennon. If you want me to—” Sophie starts but is cut off.

“We’ll tell them we’re married and having a baby,” Hunter blurts out, pulling our attention to him. “We got hitched, and you got pregnant on the honeymoon.” Hunter shrugs, pursing his lips as if the idea he came up with isn’t completely insane. “There, problem solved.”

He picks up a piece of pizza and takes a bite of it as I swallow down my heart that’s lodged deep in my throat.

My eyes widen at his idea and so do Sophie and Maddie’s. The three of us stare at him, wondering if we heard him correctly at his offer to be my fake husband and baby daddy.

By the smirk on his lips, I know I did.

Wealldid.

CHAPTER TWENTY

HUNTER

I could literally kickmy own ass for blurting that out in front of her sisters because I feel like they see right through me. Sometimes I don’t think about the repercussions before I speak or how it will make Lennon feel. As the three of them stare at me, I smile because that’s all I can do after putting myself in this situation.

I won’t allow her to go through this without some support, and if she doesn’t want her parents to completely write her off, then what’s the problem with a teeny white lie? For a moment, I try to think about why I said it as the guilt floods through me. I’m doing this for Brandon, right? Well, I am, but also for Lennon. She needs me.

However, lately, the lines have blurred, but regardless, I meant what I offered.

“I-I’m sorry. What did you say?” Lennon asks barely above a whisper, and as I look into her eyes, it feels as if her sisters disappear, and it’s just her and me.

I play it off like it’s no big deal even though it is to me. I’d do anything to keep her safe and happy, even if it means pretending to be her husband, pretending the baby in her belly is mine, and lying to her parents. If it means she’ll be able to get through this pregnancy easier, sign me up for all of it. The only person I’m concerned about is Lennon because she’s already in a vulnerable state.

“I was thinking that if they’ll disown you for this when you’re so happy about it and desperately want them in the baby’s and your life, why not tell another white lie? You’ve been telling them for a year that you live in an apartment alone when you obviously don’t. The part of me who’s selfish for you and the baby thinks lying to protect you would be the best plan. If we went to Vegas and got married, then having a child is the next step in the relationship, right?” I take my focus from her and glance at a smiling Sophie and Maddie, who are nodding in agreement.

“It’s the perfect plan,” Sophie adds. “And we grew up in Utah, Lennon. It’s almost normal for people to get married and pregnant within the same month.”

Lennon opens her mouth, but Sophie continues before she can argue. “Before you try to dismantle this idea the way you always do, we all know our parents are going to be upset that you didn’t get married in the church and eloped instead. But with that being said, they wouldn’t write you off, kick you out, and pretend you never existed. They’d probably be thrilled they’re going to be grandparents too, as long as you’re married.” Sophie turns to face Lennon. “You know what happened to Shelby Greer.”

There’s a long pause, but I’m dying to hear this. “What happened?”

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