Page 111 of Serial Killer Games

“Thanks again,” I say to Laura without making eye contact. I’m using her, unfortunately. I know she wouldn’t be here if she knew Jake and I were over, so it’s unfair what I’m doing: accepting the help of an aspiring grandma who will not be getting the permanent position. She practically threw herself at me with an offer of free babysitting. Perfect timing since my neighbor has stopped answering my texts.

“It’s my pleasure,” Laura says warmly, and she really does exude pleasure. I’ve never seen anyone this happy to spend time with my odd, uncanny little girl.

It’s hard not to worry just a little that Laura doesn’t quite know what she’s in for. “She can be very…” I have a list of words I don’t mind Cat overhearing me use. Persistent. Tough. Independent. Outspoken. “Assertive.”

“You know, when I was a girl, our mothers made a point of bringing us up to be polite and gentle andnice,” Laura says, skewering me and my mothering neatly and knocking the breath out of me with the shock of it. She manages to say it so sweetly, too, with a smile like a day in June. My heart scales over in an instant, and my eyes snap to Cat.

“But it’s such a relief to see you’re smarter than that,” Laura continues. “You and Jake aren’t going to have to worry about her, are you? She’ll be tough enough to handle the world herself.”

My eyes stay trained on Cat as my heart softens again and a fresh ache twists through it. I want to keep Laura, even if Ican’t have Jake, and I wonder if I can, if this is a friendship worth the risk. I would be able to keep tabs on Jake, at least.

In seven years I’ve never made a genuine attempt at a friendship. But for Cat’s sake, I think I would try.

There’s a whole dance that we do. Mirroring, sharing, meeting for coffees, reading each other’s book recommendations, and slowly, slowly friendship takes root and sprouts and blossoms. But I’m shit at plants. I cut to the meat.

“Can we be friends?” I wouldn’t have said anything if I had known my voice would sound this strangled.

“We’refamily.” She smiles fondly at Cat, who loops close before peeling off again. “Jake adored dogs when he was little. He’ll have to teach Cat how to train Princess to do tricks. They’ll have so much fun with that.”

My heart twists again, an uglier pain this time. Every other sentence has been “Cat and Jake” this, “you and Jake” that. It’s high time I set her straight. I summon all the flat matter-of-factness I can and push past the knot in my throat.

“Jake and I aren’t going to stay together.”

Her face slips. “But Jake says you haven’t even tried living together yet. Jake is very easy to live with.”

My eyes swim until Cat is just a red blur. Laura’s so sweet my teeth hurt. I’m not like that. I’ve always been an acquired taste. People like Laura don’t usually take to it. I give her a taste of it now. “We would end up killing each other if we stayed together.” It’s half true.

“At least you would be merciful about it. Oxycodone overdose in your own bed isn’t such a bad way to go.”

My skin prickles and my organs slide out of my body.

“Jake, on the other hand, he’s very creative with his murder weapons. I’m not sure how you’d make your home a weapon-free zone.”

I find my voice. “What?”

“Strangulation by Christmas lights was his most recent brainwave.” She shakes her head.That Jake!

I stare at her, dumbstruck. Does she know about Neil? Either Jake told her, or she googled me, or she listens toMurderers at Work—

And yet this woman, who stuffs cotton batting into corpses and spray-paints their cheeks or whatever it is she does, just told me I’m family. Wewouldmake the perfect little family.

Laura’s face changes suddenly and dramatically, and she steps back from the wall. I follow her line of sight to a silver-haired man standing five stories below in the parking lot, staring up at us, his body tense.

“Is that…?”

“Andrew.”

Jake’s uncle.

“What’s he doing here?” I ask.

Laura doesn’t answer. A strange alchemy is occurring. This sweet, warm woman is turning cold and withdrawn right before my eyes.

“He sees me,” she says. “I should go down.”

“Why?”

“If he comes up, he’ll cause a scene.” Her eyes dart to Cat, playing with Princess on the Astroturf.

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