Page 23 of Bulletproof Love

“I-It all happened so fast,” I say as I suck a breath in through my clogged nostrils. “She was sitting across from me, laughing and talking and then… she just… stopped. Her hand went to her throat and she got this look in her eyes… this terrified look. I knew something was wrong when she started scratching at her neck. Red splotches… like welts. They spread on her skin. She tried to tell me something, but her voice came out all hoarse and wheezy. Her lips were swelling up right in front of me, and her face… God, her face got so puffy. She knocked over her water glass trying to stand, her legs couldn’t keep her up.”

Jasper’s reassuring hold tightens. “I can’t even imagine how scared you must have been.”

I nod, burying my face in his chest and taking a deep breath before going on. “I screamed for help. Someone shouted about an EpiPen. Her face got so pale except for the welts. I can’t stop thinking about her eyes—they were so wide, so scared as she slumped forward. That’s when it all got crazy. People running, shouting, the manager calling 911, someone saying they were a doctor. I just… I just kept holding her hand. Even after they got her on the floor, even while they were jabbing her with the EpiPen. I kept telling her to stay with me, to keep breathing, that help was coming. The minutes before the ambulance arrived felt like hours. I’ve never felt so helpless in my life.”

“I know, baby. You did so good. I’m so fucking proud of you.” He rubs my back with his palm, sending a shiver through me. I didn’t know how much I needed this until now. The praise, the comfort, it’s everything.

“How did she look when you were back there?” I had to step out when Damon and Jasper arrived. I needed a minute and there’s only so much space in the small curtained off area. When he doesn’t answer immediately, I back away to look into his eyes. They’re wide and vacant. I’m sure I look just as scared. “Still the same?”

“I don’t know how she looked when it first happened.” He swipes his palm down his face. “She’s still covered in hives and puffy. They’ve got her on oxygen and an IV. I’m sure it’ll be a long night.”

Our conversation is interrupted by a man in scrubs yelling from the check-in area. “You can’t go in there, sir! You need to sign in!”

I look up to find Leon, pushing his way past multiple employees. “Shit,” I say. “Did anyone call him?”

Jasper hurries over, and I watch him smooth the employees over with a few words. He talks animatedly to Leon, gesturing toward the corridor right off the waiting area. I should go to them, fill Leon in, but I can’t bring my feet to move. Leon’s shoulders slump and he chews his bottom lip while he takes in what happened tonight. The weight of almost losing Blake. Jasper talks to the employee again and within seconds, Leon is led away toward Blake’s side.

I grip the arm of the chair next to me as another bout of shivers make their way through my body. Jasper’s hand wraps around my waist, once again holding me up. “I’ve got you. Come on, I’ll take you home. Damon and Leon are here with her.”

“No,” I argue. “I’m fine, just cold.”

He tightens his hold around my waist with one hand and tilts my chin up to meet his eyes with the other. “You’re not fine. None of us are. It’s okay to rest. She’s in good hands.”

She’s in good hands.

I let those words mull around in my mind. A few weeks ago, I would have immediately protested. There was no way these three guys could possibly be good enough to take care of Blake. But right now, I have no argument. Sheisin good hands. Damon would spill his own blood if it kept Blake safe. And Leon, as quiet as he is, I know he cares about her in his own way. Jasper does too. And really, what can I do that the doctors and nurses aren’t already doing? I’d just be in the way.

I nod slowly, and the corner of Jasper’s lip tips up. I hate to admit it but that small smile sends a pang to my chest.

“Let’s go say goodnight,” he says, leading me out of the waiting area toward the beds. “I’ll get the keys to Leon’s bike.”

* * *

It’s beena long time since I’ve ridden on the back of a bike. I’d forgotten how incredible it feels. That surge of adrenaline as the bike speeds up, the wind whipping against my chest and helmet, that feeling of complete freedom. The engine vibrates through my entire body, a steady rumble that matches my racing heartbeat. With my arms wrapped around Jasper’s waist and knees pressed firmly against his hips, I’m all too aware of how good it feels to let myself touch him. To have an excuse to hold him close. His body radiates warmth against the cool night air, flooding my senses. After what I witnessed tonight, I need him more than I want to admit.

When he pulls up to the curb outside our apartment building and turns off the engine, I feel my muscles tense up again. I hesitate to get off, knowing that for the first time in weeks, I’ll be walking into complete silence. Jasper pulls his mask off, and holds his hand out. “I got it,” I say.

Accepting any more comfort from him might give him the wrong idea. And tonight, after everything, I don’t have it in me to argue or push him away if he relents. I’d thoroughly soak up anything he’d give me and that would just complicate things.

“You need help with the helmet?” he asks, reminding me that I still have it on. I shake my head, pull it off, and hand it over. Once I swing my leg over the bike and stand on hard earth again, every ounce of energy I have disappears. I wobble, grabbing onto his chest for balance.

His palms wrap around my shoulders, steadying me. “Shit. I’m fine,” I say.

“Clearly you’re not.” I shrug to loosen his grip, but he holds firm. “Come on, Trouble. Or do you want me to carry you? Promise I won’t grab your ass… unless you ask nicely.”

I scoff, and step toward the door. “Don’t even think about it. Remember what I can do with a switchblade.”

As we climb the stairs, I feel his gaze burning into my back. Or maybe that’s just my body on fire from how much I’d love to stab him. Or fuck him. One of those… I haven’t decided which tonight.

The kittens run to us, meowing, and rubbing against our legs. “You hungry?” Jasper asks.

“They’re not you, they don’t need to eat seventeen times a day,” I say. I swear Jasper’s been feeding them every hour.

“How dare you body shame them,” he says as he picks up Havoc. “You’re growing girls, aren’t you?” And there’s that baby voice again.

“That was a dig at you, not them.” I rub my eyes and grab a water from the fridge. “I’m going to go shower and lay down, but first, let’s text the guys and check in.”

He opens a new bag of kitten kibble and pours some into their bowl. “Go ahead, I’ll text them and let you know when you’re done.” I stand rooted in place, watching him feed and pet the kittens. He pulls out his phone, and looks up, realizing I’m still there. “Need help in the shower too? I volunteer, and you don’t even have to ask me to grab your ass. I’ll do that and more.”

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