Page 12 of Just A Little Magic

As I made my way back inside, I heard the squeak again. It was louder than before and sounded like it came from near the porch. I ventured closer and set my books down on the steps. It was better to be safe than sorry, so I fished the keys out of my pocket just in case.

Off to one side of the porch was a jumble of boxes that someone had left in a haphazard pile. There weren’t any clues on what I should be looking for, but I was pretty sure snakes weren’t common in the Cascade Mountains. I hoped. I really, really effing hoped.

I told myself to leave it alone, go inside, and do the job I was paid to do. But like most good advice, I ignored myself and moved some lighter boxes.

Just when I knew I was wasting my time, a tiny flash of black darted inside a wood crate near the bottom of the pile. I sped up, moving the boxes off the top until I could reach the crate. I was pretty sure skunks were born in the spring, and it was much too small to be even half-grown.

Finally cleared, I crouched to get a better look and peered into the box. Hidden in the far corner was the tiniest ball of fluff. His eyes were gold and half as big as the rest of him. His body was teeny tiny. I wasn’t a kitten expert, but I’d guess his age was around eight weeks, maybe less.

He tried to hiss at me, but it mostly came out as a raspberry. He was big mad, though, and tried to intimidate me with puffed-out fur and an arched back.

It did not work.

“Hey, buddy, it’s okay.”

I kept my voice low and soft. Hopefully, it would be enough to calm him.

“I won’t hurt you. You’re so sweet. Where’s your mama? You’re too little to be out here without your mama. She’s gonna be so sad when she can’t find you.”

I jangled the keys to see if he would play with them. He wasn’t interested in that, but he did lower his arched back. I inched my hands forward to pick him up and did an imaginary happy dance when he let me scoop him up. He felt even smaller, cuddled against my chest. With a hiss, all his relaxation disappeared and he was back to raised hackles.

My attention was so focused on the sweet little demon trying to claw up my jacket that I wasn’t aware we weren’t alone until the blast of hot, stinky breath hit the back of my neck.

I froze on the spot.

When the second blast came, I clutched the kitten closer to me, made a quick prayer to any deity that might be interested in having me saved from certain death, and slowly turned around.

Oh, holy fucking shit.

“Bear!” I stammered at the black bear less than two feet away from me.

In the back of my mind, I remembered that being big and loud was the key to scaring away bears. The kitten tried to leap out of arms, hissing his most ferocious threat, but it came out squeaky and would have been adorable if I wasn’t panicking.

I rose to my feet while the bear was momentarily distracted by the cat.

“Bear! Go away, Bear!”

I raised one hand over my head and waved it while slowly backing away.

“Oh my God, go away! Bear! Bear!”

“I’m coming. Hold on a sec.”

The other Bear’s voice floated on the wind, but all I could think about was that I didn’t want to be killed by a bearanddie a fucking virgin. What if someone found out and put it in my obituary or announced it at my funeral?

Here lies Owen.

He could arrange throw pillows like a champ.

A bear killed him, and he died without ever knowing the touch of a man.

Sad story all around.

“Go away, Bear! Go! Go! Scat! Skedaddle!”

I tightened my grip on the kitten, stomped my feet, and raised my free hand. The bear had initially moved back but hadn’t budged from the new spot about three feet away. It moved forward an inch or two, and I desperately looked around for a weapon. All I had were the keys, so that’s what I would use.

I threw the keys as hard as possible at the bear’s nose. It was a direct hit. The keys bounced right off the end of the bear’s snout, and the immediate snort of surprise seemed like a good thing. The bear turned, snuffled at the keys, and ate them?What the hell? One minute, the keys were laying on the wooden planks, and then, poof, they were gone.