Page 23 of Just A Little Love

Daddy smiled at me and said, “I’ll show you later, ok?” Daddy transferred all his bags to one hand, put the tote on his shoulder, and took one of mine in his other. “Baby bunnies need to hold their daddy’s hands so they don’t get lost.” He gave me a little tug, and I giggled at his directive.

“That’s silly! I’m not a baby.” I have no clue when I started this urge to giggle all the time, but he coaxed another one out of me.

“Until this charade is over, you’re my baby.”

Charade.

His words were like cold water dumped over my head. The reality of my situation rushed back and my little trip, pun absolutely intended, was over. I was hired to do a job, period. This wasn’t a real, or even a potential, relationship we were exploring. It was nothing more than a deal to help each other out. An arrangement to earn the money I needed to save my house. The butterflies vanished, and we were back to being Gabriel and Rory. I immediately pulled my body away from his.

“Gabriel, I think we should go. Thanks for the books. I don’t know when Jakob would see them, but I’ll make sure he knows they were from you. It’s been a long week.” I faked a yawn, so I could ask to go home without arousing too much suspicion.

The look Dadd- no, not Daddy, Gabriel’s face was as miserable as my own. I wanted away from him more than I’d wanted anything in my entire life.

“Yeah, of course, that’s fine. Shall we go to the next store, then?”

“I think we’ve done enough research for today, and I’m feeling really overwhelmed. Can you please take me home? I still want to do this with you, but, yeah, I need some quiet time to decompress.” I knew I talked too fast and too loud, but I couldn’t bring myself to stop.

“Of course, I’m sorry I didn’t realize you were feeling this way. Let’s go.”

Gabriel didn’t try to hold my hand when we left the shop, but I’d also immediately put my hands in my pockets. When we got to the car, he opened my door, but I snatched the clasp so he couldn’t buckle me in. It felt so wrong, like I was all alone next to him. Maybe this was where it ought to end, but the thought of never seeing Gabriel filled me with dread. I wanted the fluttery feeling back, and reality had cruelly wiped it away.

His words were a stark reminder that when we finished this, we'd go our separate ways. I had to stop myself from doing what I always did…falling so quickly that I didn’t see any of the red flags or notice the alarm bells. Gabriel had called this a charade, and he was exactly right. It wasn't ever going to be more than pretend.

Chapter 13

Gabriel

Something happened at the store, but I wasn't sure what. I kept replaying our conversation to figure out where it went off the rails while I drove home.

Rory was fine while he picked out his books. He got antsy about my refusal to let him cull his pile any at the store but ultimately accepted my decision. Earlier he’d asked to call me Daddy to help get him in the mindset of a little, experimented with it a few times, and by all appearances he was fine. We’d gone through the store to see if anything piqued his interest and he’d liked a few things, including the baby dolls he pretended not to careabout and I knew he’d love the stuffy I found for him. Seeing the happiness on his face settled my soul in ways I hadn't felt in years. Since I didn’t know what caused such an abrupt shift for him, I wasn't sure how to fix it. No one else was around to say something to him. It was us talking about the charade we’d created.

Charade.

How the hell did I miss the signs?

Rory had sunk into subspace and probably didn’t even know it was a thing. When I used the word charade, I jerked him straight out of it. Looking back, the clues were obvious and I felt like the world’s most inexperienced Daddy—the giggling, the change of tone, and words. I’d be lucky if I saw him again after today. Was I seriously so out of practice I couldn’t take care of a sweet boy who accidentally slipped into subspace?Fuck.

Obviously, we had an agreement and I had every intention of honoring it regardless of whether Rory agreed to act as my little. If, by the magic of the universe, he actually did want to keep exploring his little side, then I’ll be happy to assist him. There wasn't space for a relationship of any intensity in my life, but I could still help him discover his interest in it. We could go to the club, and I could introduce him to some other littles. Hell, I could introduce him to a few other daddies too.

“Bunny.” He flinched at the use of his nickname, and I felt like an absolute piece of shit. “Rory, would it be possible for us to talk? I was careless. If you’ll let me, I’d like to apologize and fix it.”

“What did you do?” His voice was small and hesitant, like he wasn’t sure he had permission to speak. The distance between us in the vehicle felt more like an abyss. I was ready to kick my own ass for being so callous. Now I'd seen the full effect, I suspected Rory was feeling extra vulnerable, beyond the little issue alone. He’d lost his uncle he loved like a parent. He wasn’t sure how to save a house he desperately loved. And now he found out maybe his little persona was more than pretending for a party was a lot for anyone to wrap their head around. My status as a Daddy, albeit a non-active one, did not make me immune from mistakes, and this was a serious one.

“I’m going to tell you, but I’d like to look at you when I do it.” I tried to keep my voice gentle and calm because the last thing I wanted to do was spook him again when he was in a vulnerable state.

Rory took a steadying breath and rushed out, “If you wanted, you could come back with me to Uncle Tobias’s house. After you see it properly, it will make more sense why I want to keep it. I know you saw a little of it earlier, but it’s not the same. A-a-and we could talk privately about stuff” Rory’s voice trailed off and turned to look out the window. The uncertainty in his voice broke my heart, but I was determined to rectify my mistake.

“That’s a great idea. Let’s head over there now. I’ve been dying to get a better look at it.” After my blunder in the store, a cute nickname or holding his hand wouldn't be welcome, but I hadn’t anticipated the sense of being unmoored the rift would leave me. In such a brief period, Rory was quickly becoming my grounding anchor, which made the idea I'd help him move on with someone else disconcerting.

Future me had a shit ton of questions to figure out.

***

“Rory, this place is spectacular.” I stood dumbfounded at the intricate details of the original molding. Many, maybe most, houses like Rory's had broken up into smaller apartments. Occasionally, the exterior preserved the charm, but people almost always destroyed it in the interior during the renovations. His Victorian had the original stained glass in the transom windows over the doors. The floors were the original thin plank hardwood. Glass knobs in the interior doors had turned purple with age, and the fireplaces displayed original mosaic tile. It was a preservationist’s dream.

When Rory gave me the tour, I continued to find more things to gush about. The bottom floor consisted of the typical public spaces, which included a study. The upper floors housed the bedrooms and an additional family room. It was the third-floor attic where I fell in love. It had stairs access to the attic, rather than a pull-down ladder, and had a standard ceiling height with the most amazing turret space ringed with windows. The space was only used for storage, but had endless potential to be transformed into something extraordinary.

If I remembered the paperwork correctly, the pipes and electrical were a concern, in addition to some potential foundation issues. The bathrooms I saw, along with a quick glimpse in the kitchen, needed to be updated but were usable. The interior floors were original but had to be refinished and properly sealed. Luckily, an abatement of asbestos hadhappened in the 1990s, which was the brightest spot in the report.

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