Page 5 of Lance & Clayton

"I'm happy for you. I truly am. So, you're into older men, huh? Who would've thought."

"Yup." I chuckled nervously and nodded. "I have a type and it's older men. Or at least that's one way of putting it. God, I hope Lance is the one. He's so tall, handsome, and dreamy. He's got these dimples every time he smiles. And most importantly, I feel so safe and protected in his big, strong arms. While I'm getting things off my chest, there's something else you should know. I feel like I need to come out to you all over again, but this time as the real me."

"Another coming out?" She frowned and sat closer. "What's it about?"

I drew a deep breath and opened my mouth to speak, but the words wouldn't come out.

"Hey, it's okay. You know me. There's nothing you could say that would make me love you any less. If you don't think you're ready, you don't have to say it now. Just know that I'll be here when you need me."

I couldn't hide it any longer, so I gathered all my strength. "I… I'm into age play, Julia. Do you know what that is?"

"Kind of," she said after a pause, her eyes widening in surprise. "One of my friends told me about it once. So, you're a Little then?"

"I shouldn't have said anything." I shook my head, standing up. "I feel so silly. You probably think I'm a freak."

"No." She took my hand and sat me back down. "I'm just surprised because it's the last thing I expected you to say. It isn't weird or anything, just different. Besides, people are so different from one another. Life is much more complicated than people make it out to be. You should do whatever makes you happy, and if it means wearing a diaper and sucking on a pacifier, then so be it."

I couldn't believe how open-minded she was turning out to be. Just a week ago I was worried sick about how she'd react to me being gay. Now I was telling her I was a Little and she accepted me with open arms.

She wiggled her eyebrows and smiled. "So, you want Lance to be your Daddy, eh? Who knew you were so kinky!"

I looked up at the ceiling and sat in silence before I began. "Well, I don't know about that yet. Not everyone's willing to be a Daddy. Wouldn't it be much easier for him to look for another man instead? We had such a great connection and I can't risk everything just because I need him to be my Daddy. It wouldn't be fair. I guess I'll just have to hide it from him for as long as I can."

Lance was a handsome hunk. He could've had any man in the club, but he chose me. I was pretty sure anybody would find the whole call me Daddy thing hot, but wearing a diaper and sucking on a paci would freak some out.

"Come on, Clayton." She shrugged. "That's not true. You never know how someone’s gonna react. You thought I'd freak out but I didn't. Relationships are built on trust and honesty. When you feel ready, you should tell him. If he doesn't accept you for who you are, then it's his loss and it wasn't meant to be. You might scare him away, but at least he'd get to know the real you. There's no in-between when it comes to being who you are. You either stay in the closet or live your life as an openly gay Little."

A part of me knew that she was right. No matter how hard you try to hide it, the truth eventually comes out.

"Is everything going to be alright, Julia? The things I'm into go against everything mom and dad have taught us. I'm scared."

"Don't be. Live your life the way you want to. If they could, mom and dad would live your life for you. Just remember, don't come out until you're financially independent."

I found her support overwhelming. "Thank you, Julia. I don't know what I'd do without you."

I wished our parents were as open-minded as her. Maybe then they wouldn't have to choose between God and their son's happiness. Life would've been much simpler.

Chapter 4: Lance

I had to make sure everything was just right for a romantic Saturday at my cabin in the woods. Scented candles were everywhere and since I had originally trained to be a chef, I had prepared an elaborate meal for dinner. I ensured the bedroom was comfortable enough for us to have sex in, in the unlikely event that things headed that way. I meant it when I told John that I was willing to wait for an eternity for him to be ready. I'd had enough sex for a lifetime. Now it was time to enjoy other things that a man had to offer, meaningful and long-lasting things.

I arranged for a colorful snack box to please the Little in him. He wouldn't be ready to tell me on the first date, but it didn't matter. I was willing to accept him for whatever side he chose to show me. I also hid away some Little things that I bought from the baby aisle, things such as a pacifier, some toys, a sippy cup, a coloring book, some storybooks, and crayons. I needed to be prepared on the off chance that he was ready to reveal his Littleness early on in our relationship. A good Daddy always came prepared.

I had sent him the location of the cabin since he refused to be picked up. It was one of the topics I meant to discuss with him. Everyone should have the privilege of feeling safe at their home, and I had a feeling Clayton didn't feel comfortable enough to be himself around his family.

He'd mentioned in one of our chats that he loved films but he wasn't allowed to watch them. So, I bought a big TV to put in the living room. If he got too nervous for being around a stranger in the middle of the woods, watching an animated film was sure to bring out his Little side and calm him down.

In the minutes before his arrival, I went through everything once again like the perfectionist that I was. When the doorbell rang, my joy knew no bounds. I couldn’t wait to see that sweet face of his again. I rushed to open the door and there he stood, just as cute as the day I met him at the club. He had a backpack on and the brightest smile.

"Come in," I said, taking his hand and leading him in. "You didn't have trouble finding the place? Did you drive here?"

He shook his head and took a seat next to me on the couch. "No. I pretty much take the bus everywhere. I was expecting it to be a small cabin, but this here is big enough to be a mansion."

The cabin was surrounded by trees on all sides and the windows were big enough to enjoy the view. The only downside was the possibility of coming across wild animals. There were quite a few bears in that part of the forest.

I chuckled and offered him a glass of water. "This old thing? I'm glad you like it. I haven't used it in so long, I was planning on selling it, but I'm glad I didn't. When people ask us where our first date was, I can tell them in the middle of the woods."

He blushed as he struggled to look me in the eyes. "So you think this will last too? I don't know why but I feel the same way. It's quite silly, isn't it? It's our first date and we're already talking about our future. And yet it feels so right, Lance. We have a connection and there's no denying it."