Page 17 of Lance & Clayton

Before one of them came upstairs to try to kill me again, I ran into my room and locked the door. I packed the bare necessities in a suitcase and rushed downstairs, hoping that seeing me with a suitcase would change their mind.

"Please, Dad," I begged as my vision blurred. Dad sat at the table, not even looking me in the eye. "I don't want to go. I don’t want to be homeless."

"Just don't show me your face ever again. As long as you refuse to follow God's word, you're dead to me."

I looked at them one last time before heading out the door, remembering all the times they said they loved me, only for it all to end in such a hateful way.

With what little money I had, I went to the only place where I knew I would find kindness, to Lance's cabin in the woods. He'd been living there temporarily since his home was being renovated.

I walked up to the door and just as I was about to knock on the door, I considered if I shouldn't just turn back and leave. What had happened to me was embarrassing and I didn't want to burden Daddy with my problems. It was far too early on in the relationship to even ask for us to live together. Besides, without financial support, I'd just end up being a burden on him. Maybe it was best we headed separate ways. Who would want to be in a relationship with a hobo? Maybe it was time I just accept my fate and move on.

"Goodbye, Daddy," I whispered as I turned around to leave. "You've been kind to me and I thank you for that."

Just as I began to walk away, the door flew open and I heard his sweet voice. "What's the matter, sweetheart?"

I turned around and the mere sight of him brought tears to my eye. I instinctively ran towards him and threw my arms around his chest. "My mom made a homophobic remark about an old gay couple who's just moved into the neighborhood. I couldn't take it anymore, so I came out to them on a whim. My father threatened to kill me if I didn't leave. They kicked me out and I didn't know where else to go."

"You're talking a mile a minute, bright eyes," he said, stroking my head and leading me in. "And you're shaking like a leaf. Come and sit in Daddy's lap. Daddy will make it all better."

When he led me to the couch and I sat on his lap, I put my head against his chest as he wiped my tears.

"Now take a few deep breaths and relax before telling me what happened."

I did as told and this time when I told him everything, I couldn't help but begin to cry hysterically. "I'm homeless now, Daddy. I didn't have anywhere to go, so I had to come here. Will you please let me stay here for tonight so I can search for a homeless shelter tomorrow?"

Watching me cry had made him teary-eyed. When I looked up at him, he was blinking rapidly so I wouldn't notice.

"Hush now, my sweet boy." He kissed my head before leaning to kiss my cheek. "I promised myself I wouldn't let another tear form in your eyes, but I continue to fail. Also, you're being silly if you think I'd let you become homeless, sweetheart. Is this why you were turning to leave? You were willing to abandon your Daddy because you thought I wouldn't want a homeless boy?"

Having him so close to my body and listening to his deep soothing voice was very comforting.

I nodded, hugging him tighter, and finally calming down. "I don't have financial support anymore, so I didn't want to bother you with my problems. My problems are far too big for any Daddy, even for the best Daddy in the world."

He gave me his serious Daddy look, which meant I was being silly. "No problem is too big for a Daddy to handle. I want you to remember that going forward. You can live with me for as long as you want. Nothing would bring me more joy than to see you right before my eyes each day, to wake up next to you in bed."

"But I don't want to be a burden on…" I began but he shushed me with a finger on my lip.

"No buts and that's final. Do you want your Daddy to be sad, bright eyes? Because not getting to see you each day has been unbearable. I can't focus on my work because I keep wondering what my sweet boy must be doing right this instant. Is he holding onto Dino to remind him of Daddy? Does he miss seeing me as much as I do?"

"I do, Daddy. I swear I do. You're all I think about. I count every hour until I get to be in your arms again."

"Good," he said and nodded. "Then you'll listen to me like the good boy you are and live with me as long as you want to."

"Fine," I said finally with a smile.

"There's that cute little smile that I love." He leaned in and kissed me on the lips. I knew he meant it when he said Daddy was going to make everything better.

Chapter 10: Lance

I felt like a failure for my own incompetence. I had promised myself I would never let another tear form in my boy’s eyes, but I failed horribly. If only I knew how I could ensure my boy’s happiness. Luckily, I knew a man who’d been a Daddy longer than I was.

While my boy was still fast asleep the next morning, I rang John. When he spoke, I heard Michael singing loudly in the background to annoy his Daddy.

“Is this a good time, John?” I asked as I heard him move away from Michael’s loud singing.

“Yes, yes,” he said. “My boy’s throwing a tantrum and he needs some disciplining, but that’s how boys get when they want to test their Daddy’s love for them. I just had to chase him around the house with training pants in my hands. He wanted to try living in the nude.”

I chuckled and shook my head, knowing full well how naughty Michael could get. “Ah, your boy is naughty, but I know you love him just the same. You should tell him that more often. I love mine too, but I haven’t said the actual words yet. I’m waiting for the right time. I need to ensure he’s ready to hear it. So listen, the reason I called...I had promised myself I would never let my boy cry again, that I would be the reason for his happiness, but something happened and I failed horribly, John. I feel so bad about it. Failing in my business doesn’t feel bad, but being a Daddy who fails his boy does.”

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