Page 120 of The Rat

Rory scrunched up his face. “Ithought I’d be begging for your forgiveness today. Telling you that I lovedyou, but I understood why you had to kill me.”

“Kill you?” Morrismumbled.

“He thought I was gonnastrangle him.”

“That’s messedup.”

“I know,” Sebastian snapped.“It’s a fucking huge mess, and it was me that caused it.”

“But Pauly… you denied what he said in theprison?”

“He was outing you in front ofeveryone. I knew you’d hate for Ollie and Captain to find out likethat, so I provoked him.”

Rory stopped fighting andrelaxed in Sebastian’s arms. “Idon’t even know who I am anymore. I don’tknow what I’m supposed to do, it was easier when I thought you weregonna kill me.”

“I’ll never kill you, and I’llnever hurt youagain.”

“The farm… the barrels?”

“I’ll explain later.” Sebastianmurmured, “for now, let’s just sit.”

Rory nodded. He was incapable of doinganything else, and it was only due to Sebastian’s arms he hadn’tfallen forward and landed in the pebbles.

“I’ll see you later, Morris,” Sebastianmumbled.

She went to walkaway, butstopped and turned back to Rory. “There’s somethingelse…”

“I don’t think I can handleany more.”

“You didn’tfail.”

“I can confidently say Ifailed at being an undercover officer.”

Morris shook her head. “That’s not what Imeant.”

“Then what?”

“Those entrance exams,you didn’tfail any of them.”

Rory snorted. “Yeah, I did, threetimes, Hamish—

“Marked you down repeatedly, hefailed you. You’re not the first person he’s done it to. Helikes peopleto feel they owe him.”

“What?”

“That bastard.” Sebastiangrowled.

“I passed?”

Morris shot him a small smile.“Yeah…”

They watched her walk back up thebeach, then Rory shook his head.

“It doesn’t even matter, Idunno who I am. AllI know is I’m broken.”

“Then let me help put you backtogether again. I’ll help you work this out.I’ll help you make bridges withCaptain and Ollie. I’ll be a support for you.”

“You’re only saying it becauseyou feel guilty, and even after you’ve told me all this, I stillfeel like I betrayed you. I still feel guilty. Ifell for you, and Icontinued ratting you out to Hamish.”

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