Page 41 of The Freshman

He moved to the filing cabinet andgrabbed a section of the files, all in alphabeticalorder.

“Good,” Henry mumbled.“You’re starting to take this job seriously.”

“Says the man asleep in achair.”

Henry wagged his finger. “Less ofthat, I’m resting my eyes.”

Alfie turned back to the files andopened the first one. Richard Adam, in for a GBH charge. He sighed,then began to read.

As he read file after file, herealized words like Rapist, GBH, and Murder were horrible on theirown, but worse when you learned the context. The details of theinmate’s crimes were darker than Alfie imagined, and by the end ofthe shift he peered into the dark of H-wing with his stomachsloshing with unease.

He understood the ‘us and them’feeling the prison had. The small breaches of protocol, obsessivesmoking on the job, sex on the job, and sleeping on the job werenothing compared to what the men had done inside the cells.Disgust, weariness, and anger surfaced in Alfie. The owners of thevoices that answered him in the dark had done horrible things. Hehad always known it, but it never seeped in fully until heregistered names, ages, weapons, and for those victims that werestill alive, statements. He felt sick, and after each file hepaused and rubbed his hands over his face.

Henry didn’t slip his glasses backover his eyes. He watched as Alfie read file after file, as if hehad memorized each one. He wanted a reaction, and he nodded slowlyeach time Alfie hissed or scrunched his face.

“Evil,” Henry said. “Norehabilitation for most of the folk in here, and then there’s Nate.He’s the worst of them.”

Alfie stared at the cabinet. Nate’sfile was still inside. He was leaving it for last.

At the end of the shift, he tidied thefiles away under the watchful eye of Ryan. He nodded at Alfie, andAlfie nodded back. Some mutual understand flowed between the dayshift and night, and Alfie realized he’d just been accepted. It hadtaken him months, but all he needed to do was read the files andreact in the expected way.

The next day was Friday, and Alfiecouldn’t wait for it to be done. He needed a rest, needed to seeTia and feel there was still life away from metal bars, locks,concrete, and the ‘scum of the earth’ Nate had labelledthem.

Alfie rapped his knuckles to Nate’sdoor at roll call. “I took your advice and went through thefiles.”

“You’re lying,” Natereplied.

“I’m not—”

“You wouldn’t be speakingto me like this if you read mine.”

Alfie sighed through his nose. “I readeveryone’s but yours and Queenie’s.”

Nate didn’t speak, but Alfie couldfeel his presence by the door.

“Why not read ours, too?”Queenie asked.

“Because I don’t want tohate you, either of you.”

Nate chuckled. “You’ve said you hateme plenty of times.”

“Fine, I don’t want tohate Queenie.”

Alfie turned at the sound of Queenietapping his nails to his door.

“Thanks, Alfie. That’sreal sweet of you.”

“He’s being bloodystupid,” Nate mumbled. “What if my file told you I lure young,attractive men to me, and then snap their necks?”

“You had the opportunity,and you didn’t.”

Nate hummed in thought. “Maybe I’mplaying the long game, having some fun with you first.”

Alfie closed his eyes and shook hishead. “I’m not gonna read your file, even with you saying that, Iwon’t read it.”

“Why not?”

“I told youwhy.”

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