Page 57 of Monster

“I hated you and the fact you weren’t there.”

Luca nodded, tears stinging the backs of his eyes.

“But I was a child. Now, I know exactly what you endured… and I know you’d have loved to be there, tucking me in every night.”

Luca smiled wanly. “If only it could’ve been.”

A moment of silence fell between them. Luca struggled to wrangle in his emotions for this grown child… how much he’d missed.How much Zed had taken from him, years he could never get back. “How long have I been gone?”

“About fifty years.”

Luca gasped, shocked it had been that long. “I’m surprised I’m still alive.”

“That makes two of us,” Bull said.“But I’m glad you are.”

Luca wasn’t completely sure he was glad. Fifty years of torture… it did things to the soul. “Where’s your mother?”

From the look on Bull’s face, he knew the answer wasn’t a good one.“She passed. About fourteen years ago.”

An ache formed in Luca’s chest. While he had loved her with his whole heart, he felt so removed from the man he’d once been that he struggled to find the feelings within.

Guilt washed through him. He should be more heartbroken at her passing. “The only thing I can remember at this point is her smile. And the red lipstick she always wore. That smile is something I held on to for a long, long time.”

“She wore that red up until her death.Never left the house without it, even if it was a quick jaunt to milk the cows.”

“Cows?” Luca smiled. He couldn’t imagine Ella the Milkmaid. “Did she find happiness again?”

“She did. She remarried back in the nineties and finally found another to love. I don’t think she loved him in the same way as she did you, but it gave her some joy. He loved her wholeheartedly.She was his world.”

“I’m glad for it,” he answered, his smile fading some. He could see the pain in Bull’s face. “You miss her?”

“I do,” Bull said.

“The memories I have of her… they feel so distant. Like they were another’s memories implanted into my brain. I know I loved her…”

“It’s okay,” Bull said. “After everything you’ve been through, I’m sure the shock of it all has you feeling numb.”

“Numb.That’s a good way to describe how I feel.” There was one part of him that wasn’t so numb.“That man who was here earlier… Drake… who is he?”

Bull stiffened. “Why do you ask?”

“I see images of him in my mind… little bits and pieces… and I feel… I feel like I should know him. That he’s important somehow.”

The smile completely faded from Bull’s face. “Drake. He helped unlock the prison you were in… the one inside your mind. After what Zed did to you—you were driven insane. Nothing we did could help… he found a way to save you.”

“Yet I’m still in a prison,” Luca said, glancing at the bars.

“A matter of days ago, you were a raging beast. A danger to others… and potentially, yourself. Those bars are for your safety—and ours. We hope the control you now feel will continue. If it does for a few more days, we’ll move you to a more comfortable, secure room that will feel less like a jail cell.If you hold on for longer—you’ll be freed.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Luca said. A soft smile graced his face until the question that had been burning in his soul needed out. “Why haven’t I seen Drake these past days?”

“Do you wish to see him?”

I have to see him. “I’d like to thank him… for what he’s done.”

“Is that all?”

Luca lifted a brow.“Should there be more?”