Page 59 of Dream with Me

Anxiety creeps into my chest. Why does it feel like now that I’m getting some clarity on how I feel about Troy, about what I want to happen moving forward, I’m starting to really lose him?

“Hello?” I look up to find Tillie standing at the side of her desk, her bag in hand and an amused frown on her face. “Where were you just then? You went from smiling and looking peaceful to worried and sad in a matter of seconds.”

“Sorry about that. Daydreaming. Let’s get out of here.”

Tillie and I do lunch together almost every day we work. Sometimes, we stay in the break room, but every couple of weeks, we go out. We already went out last week, but Tillie wanted to speak to me in private today, so we walk to the small sandwich shop two blocks away. It’s rare to see anyone else from our office here. Plus, they make the best Caprese sandwich, and their beer cheese soup in a bread bowl is to die for.

We make idle chatter on the way there, order at the counter, and then find our seats, placing our number on the table so the staff knows where to find us. There are only a few people in here—probably because we eat lunch early due to my altered schedule—and it’s peaceful and quiet.

“So, first of all, how are you feeling? After taking all those tests, you must be relieved it’s over. I still can’t believe you were crazy enough to take them so close together.” Tillie grins at me, waiting expectantly for my response.

“Yeah, I don’t think I appreciated how hard it would be, but if I had known, I probably wouldn’t have done it that way. On the other hand, I studied hard for months and got it all over with. Now, I don’t have to worry about it, and I can focus on work when I’m at work and be with my family when I’m not. If I never read another study question again, it’ll be too soon.”

Tillie chuckles.

“I’m sure you did great. Plus, there is something to be said for getting it over with.” She hesitates and bites the inside of her cheek for a second. “So, where do you see yourself going now?” Tillie’s voice becomes serious, and she tilts her head, watching my response closely.

“You know, I don’t know. I think I’ll wait to get my test results back and then figure out whether I want to stay here or look for something else. You know, we’ve talked about how this type of work is less fulfilling for me. It’s important that I’m making a difference. I want to work with people whose businesses are at a level where I can still have a personal touch with them, like my friend Emily and her business. It’s a small woman-owned business, but it’s at a level where she wants it. She’s had opportunities to scale up further, but that’s not in line with what she wants for her life. She does things she loves in the volume that fit into her life. Same thing with Lizzy at the Elladine Bakehouse. Her business is popular, and sure, if she went to a bigger city, she could make a killing. Sometimes she gets orders from the city for her cookies and cupcakes and even has to turn them away. But it’s important to her to stay in a community like ours. She likes being in a small town and knowing all her customers. I need to figure out where my place is, I guess.”

Tillie grins and puts a finger over her mouth. She leans back, and as she does, our food is delivered.

“Before we start eating, let me ask you something,” she says. “I know we’ve talked about opening a business—one that serves the exact type of clients you described. What do you think about taking the leap soon? Like now. I’ve been researching plans where we’d still have access to health insurance, and that house I’ve been showing you still hasn’t gone on the market, but I’m watching it. I’m thinking we could use the space in my new house—I have two guest bedrooms that we could turn into offices—and start our business there. You could work as much or as little as you wanted, and we could build a business model that serves the type of clients we want while also serving our lives instead of us serving work.” She inhales deeply when she finally stops talking.

I stare at her, and my mouth hangs open. I can’t seem to close it, and if I don’t blink soon, my eyes are going to dry up like sand. After a few long seconds, I pull myself from my shock and lean forward, resting my clenched hands on the table.

“Are you serious? I know we’ve talked about this, but I always thought it was something years away. You’re talking about doing this now?”

Tillie bites her lower lip, and then a broad smile spreads across her face.

“I am if you are. I told you I was hesitant to do it by myself, but financially, I have enough to get us started—especially if we can find clients quickly. I don’t know how dependent you are on your salary, though. I know at first, we won’t earn as much as we make here until we build a client base. But I do believe that it has the potential to be much more meaningful than this job.”

We spend the rest of our lunch talking about the possibilities, and by the time we’re finished eating, I’m more than excited and ninety-nine percent convinced this is the right move for me. We’ll need to work on a business plan and make an exit plan from our current jobs, but Tillie’s smart, and we have plenty of access to people who’ve started their own businesses. I’m confident we can figure it out.

I’ll need to talk to Troy first and make sure this won’t cause any issues. Tillie’s place is over the border in Aron Falls, and I want to check he wouldn’t object to me being twenty-five minutes away if the kids ever need anything from school.

Yeah, that’s why I want to tell him about it. Sure.

CHAPTER32

SHANNON

I look down at my phone screen and frown. Then, I check to be sure the sound is all the way up for the third time. I haven’t heard from Troy in a while.

Me: Hey, is there a time we could meet for drinks to talk?

The text remains unanswered. Not that Troy has to answer me immediately, but I sent it around eight o’clock last night. Yes, he was at the fire station, but he typically checks his phone before bed or at least in the morning. It’s already eleven a.m. I had to be at work a little earlier today, so I dropped Chase off at my parents’ place. Troy will pick him up when he gets off work at the station. I hope everything’s okay, and I debate whether I should text again. I decide to go ahead and do it.

Me: Are you okay?

I watch the screen as the three dots appear, signaling he’s typing a response. It’s an eternity as I wait, wondering what’s going on with him. But then the three dots disappear, and there’s no text. My previous two messages now show “read.” Still nothing from Troy. When my phone finally dings, I look down.

Troy: Yes, I’m fine.

Me: Okay. I wasn’t worried about Chase. I just want to make sure you’re okay. You didn’t answer my text last night.

This time, I don’t even get the three dots. Eventually, I get back to work. Every couple of minutes, I glance down at my phone to see if I missed something. I check to ensure the phone isn’t on “Do Not Disturb.”It’s not. I look down at my watch; it’s been an hour and a half since I texted him last.

“What’s with the frown on your face?” I look up to see Will standing next to my desk.

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