Page 54 of The Soul Never Forgets

She calls him J.D. By his own account, that’s the name hispalscall him.

He shushes her and strokes her hair with his hand. His lips move, but his voice is too low for me to make out what he’s saying to her. But I can feel his vibe all the way across the room. The man is filled with compassion for her.

Dawsey pulls away from her and wipes away her tears but not the way a lover might. His gesture is more like that of a friend or older brother.

He pulls out a seat from the table for her and then seats himself across from her. Elbows on the table, she pushes her fingers into her hair and grips the top of her head, looking down at the table. Unable to look into his eyes.

I can’t feel her vibration, but I can read her body language. She’s consumed by guilt.

Watching them feels like an intrusion on their privacy, so I focus out the cafe’s window and look at the people and cars coming and going. I occasionally sip my cafe de olla and pick at the rollo de canela that I can’t bring myself to eat because my stomach is in knots as well. Within minutes, the poor pastry looks like a rat has been gnawing on it.

It’s impossible to not peek at Dawsey from time to time. Each time I do, I see that he’s immersed in deep conversation with Devin without so much as a glance my way. I can’t tell how their discussion is going, but I know the cue to join them hasn’t come. And so I wait.

They’ve been talking for at least thirty minutes when Devin turns in her seat and looks at me. Our eyes meet and she briefly surveys me while I do the same. Still no cue to join them.

And then she gets up and leaves the cafe.

What’s happening? Is she gone? Is she coming back?

I’m confused.

Dawsey gets up and comes to my table. “Well, that was one of the more interesting conversations she and I ever had.”

“What happened?”

“I came here to have one conversation, and she came here to have another one.”

“What kind of conversation did she want to have?”

“Devin thought she was going to come here, cry, ask for forgiveness, and I’d let that shit go and forget what I saw.”

She literally asked him to forgive her and stay together and still get married? That takes nerve. I’ll give her that.

“That’s why she didn’t want to meet me?”

“Precisely.”

She realized what kind of wonderful man she was losing. “I don’t blame her for trying. I’d grovel to hold on to you too.”

“That train left the station the moment I met you.”

“Out of curiosity, what did she have to say about the guy?”

“She never said who he was or how she met him, but she did say that she’s never cheated on me before. This was the first and only time.”

“Do you believe that?”

He shrugs. “I don’t have an interest in whether she has or hasn’t. I don’t care enough to put any thought into it.”

She and Dawsey haven’t had sex in over a year. She went looking for what she wasn’t getting out of her relationship with him. This wasn’t the first time she was with another man. I’d put money on it.

“You don’t ever have to look back on this and have regrets about how you handled the situation. She, on the other hand, will have to live with what she did to you and how she handled it afterward. You could have parted as friends, but she ruined that. It’s her loss.”

“I did what I came to do, and now I’m a free man.”

“Well, technically, you’re not a free man. You’re mine. All of you.”

Every. Last. Inch.

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