Page 79 of Blitz'd

I really should leave.

I don’t know if he can see that on my face too, because he steps forward suddenly, but all he does is walk us back until we’re completely caught in the shadow of the balcony, so no one can see us.

“Why didn’t your mom stop him?”

“Fuck, you really—” My voice spikes in anger, and I see his expression widen. Was that what he looked like earlier? No, it was probably worse then. I force myself to take a deep breath.

I’m doing this.

I already told myself I was doing this.

Which means I need to talk.

“She’s probably one of the only reasons I haven’t completely cut them out yet. I think a part of me thought if I made it, if I showed her how much Dad’s money meansshit…I don’t know.” It soundsstupidcoming from my lips, but I know it’s true. A part of me thought if I made it, if I broke my dad of his pride, of his beliefs, if I showed him how fucking wrong he’s always been… maybe she’d see it too.

But that’s not right.

“If she didn’t stop him, why should you try to save her?” Zander’s voice is genuine, but I can hear the undercurrent of anger beneath it. “Does he hurt her?”

“No.” The answer is solid, sure. “Just me. He thinks I’m just an extension of him, so he can do whatever he wants to me.”

“Then fuck them both.” The vehemence in his voice is so palpable I can almost feel it against my skin. It’s warm and fierce andsolid.It’s soreal.

“Yeah, I guess so. I don’t know why I ever gave a shit to begin with.”

Zander draws up short, frowning. “She’s your mom. You always want your mom there cheering you on.” He sounds sure of that too, and I can tell from the way he says it thathehas a mother who has always supported him. I’d usually scoff, maybe call him out on it. Instead, I just shrug again, leaning back so my shoulders hit the siding of the house and I can drop my gaze to the ground again.

“I don’t need anyone cheering me on but you, Dimples.”

I almostchokegetting the words out, but they’re there and they’retrue.It’s not exactly an apology, and it’s not me saying we’re boyfriends and I’m going to treat him right. I already told him there’s a huge possibility I’ll get mad again, that I’ll say mean shit that’s going to hurt his feelings.

But if I can say this to him now, maybe he’ll realize that we can always come back from it.

Warm fingers slide along my jawline again, cupping my face and forcing me to look up. Even in the dark, I can see that Zander’s cheeks are a little flushed. I canseethe jump of his pulse in his neck.

“What did you say?”

Fuck me, is this my penance? Is this how he’s going to make me pay for being a dick earlier?

“You heard me.”

“Say it again.” The small quirk of a smile at the corner of his mouth tells me that yes, this is exactly how he’s going to punish me. Even as he does it, though, his thumb brushes the corner of my lips where the cut still stings.

I blow my breath out slowly and grit my teeth for a second before sighing. “I realized it after he hit me, after I broke my phone and I was sitting there thinking I’d fucked everything up?—”

“You still might have.” The tease in his voice says otherwise, but he hikes his brows like he’s daring me to stop now.

“I told them to fuck off. I didn’t understand why, or what had changed… but it’s you. Fuck, Zander. You changed everything.” When I shiver at my own words, he tilts his head. I could be done with that and it would probably be enough for him because it’s more than I’ve ever givenanyone, but for some reason, now that I’ve started, I have to keep going. “I’ve spent my whole life wanting to prove to my dad that I’m worth more than he could ever be, that I’m a better person than he couldever dreamof being. When I was younger, it was what kept me going some nights… and then I realized I didn’tneed itanymore.”

“No?” Zander’s voice is soft, full of some emotion I can’t quite place.

“No. I don’t need to prove shit to either of them because I have you.” My chest feels tight, so I smirk at him and quickly add on. “Why would I need them when I could spend the rest of my career showing you I’m a better player than you are?”

He lets me get away with the levity, because a loud laugh bursts from his chest and I can feel something in mine settle. I was worried I wasn’t going tohearhis dumbass laugh again, or see him smile.

I wasworriedI’d fucked up, and I was going to have to spend the rest of my life stalking Zander and catching him off guard so I could touch him. I raise my hand now, almost like an experiment, and carefully run my fingers through his hair, pushing the strands from his face while I step closer to him.

He freezes, his expression shuttered for just a second before it goes soft when I lean in and bury my nose against his hair.

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