Page 90 of Blitz'd

The word hovers there on the back of my tongue, growing into something enormous that feels like it’s blocking my airway.

No.

It’s all I have to say. I know if I tell Zander I’m not comfortable with the thought of him oranyonefucking me, he’ll back off. If I tell him the mere picture of being held down and exposed like that is too much, he’d probably flip over and let me fuck him so I could feel like I was in control.

No.

It’s the easiest word in the world to say, and I’ve sure as fuck said it to dozens of people who have wanted things from me… but for some reason, with Zander looking at me with his big brown eyes, it’s caught on the back of my tongue. It won’t come up. It feels like there’s little threads—tiny chains—wrapped around it and it’s somehow anchored to my ribs.

To my heart.

I can’t tell him no.

“I…” I frown, cutting myself off and pushing into a sitting position. His brows dip and he inhales sharply, like he can see right through me.

“Kerian, we don’t have to?—”

“Fine.” I cut him off before he can get worked up. It’s not just that Ican’ttell him no; I don’twantto tell him no. “You really are a greedy slut, aren’t you? You just want all my firsts.”

That’s as close as I’m going to get to telling him I’ve never done this before, but Iwantto do this with him.

Zander’s eyes go wide and then soft, and I can’t stand the expression. I rise up and wrap my fingers around his wrists, using his shock to yank him down onto the bed so I can roll on top of him.

“What are you?—”

“There’s just one thing, Dimples. I’m still going to fuck you.” I roll my hips experimentally, and my sensitive ass brushing against his bulge is enough to make me shudder and my cock twitch.

“I—” Zander’s expression is dazed, but he slowly comes back to himself. “I can live with that.”

“Thought so.” I raise up on my knees and his hips chase the friction, the desperation on his face enough to make me smile. “Get naked.”

Zander Braithe is still a bottom, even when he’s fucking me, because he wriggles beneath me and strips faster than I thought possible without leaving the bed. Apparently he planned for this too, because he reaches over into a nightstand and pulls out a bottle of lube with a huge grin and a flush spreading across his chest that I feel mesmerized by, like I can see the blood running just beneath his skin.

He blows out a shaky breath when he’s finished, and I realize he’s just as nervous about this as I am—the only difference is he’s not trying to hide it. He just smooths his hands up along my hips and stares up at me like I’m God and he just discovered religion.

I force a cocky smirk across my lips and arch a brow. “Are you just going to lie there or are you going to use that lube?”

He lets out a laugh that tingles along my skin, and pops the cap of the bottle open. I have to force myself to bite my tongue so I don’t say something ridiculous like“Be gentle”or“This is my first time.”

Nope.

Not happening.

Instead, I spread my legs and lean into it when he moves lube-slicked digits between my cheeks. I’m already open and wet from the way he was tongue fucking me, so it doesn’t take much pressure for him to slide one finger inside.

I shudder, leaning into the pressure and ignoring the slight burn. It must show on my face, though, because Zander smoothes his hand along my thigh, across my abdomen, and looks up at me with an expression full of wide-eyed wonder.

“Fuck, you’re warm. And soft, like silk.” He slides his finger out and comes back with two, but his touch on my stomach grounds me and I rock back, taking him in to the knuckle. I hiss out, but the sound punches into a low groan when he crooks his digits and I feel little starbursts of pleasure sizzle across my nerves.

“Fuck. You practice on yourself to know where that is, Dimples?” I rock back against him again, riding his hand in slow, steady movements that he eats up. This is easy—if I’m the one in control, I can do this.

I can give this to him.

“Is this why you want to fuck me so much?” Zander breathes the question out in a soft groan, his hips rolling against the air so I can feel the brush of his hard cock against my thigh. “Because it feels like this?”

I snort, but lean forward so I can trail my hand along his chest, tweaking his nipple hard enough to make him groan. “If you’re going crazy about your fingers, what are you going to do when it’s your dick?”

“Jesus,is this how I feel around your dick?” He gasps and Ifeelhis cock give a bob between us, tapping at my ass like it’s begging to be let in.

---