Page 60 of Sugar, Spice, and Magical Midlife

“Then he’s not a succubus.” She tilted her head in my direction while continuing to glare at Gus. “I’m still trying to understand why you tried to suppress this witness.”

“H-h-how can we trust the sphinx’s lover?” he stammered, a glaringly obvious look of guilt reflecting in his eyes.

She wagged a disapproving finger. “That’s not for you to decide. You are the lead investigator in the murder of the husk, Lenny Ledbetter?”

“I am,” he said in a mousy voice, not sounding very much like the lead of anything.

She eyed him while tapping her chin with one of those long fingernails that reminded me of sharpened blades. “I didn’t realize homicide detectives were also health inspectors.”

“The Division of Unapproved Magic in New Mexico is a small unit of the American Supernatural Society, so I oversee everything.”

“Yesss,” she drawled while rolling her eyes, “the DUM-ASSes. We’ve heard of them.”

I flinched, pulling Des closer to me when the crowd broke into boisterous laughter. Ordinarily, I would’ve laughed, too, but not when Ric’s life was hanging in the balance.

The sorceress silenced the crowd with a stern look. “The New Mexico DUM-ASSes must be averysmall division,” she said to Gus. “Is it true what she says about the crime scene?”

“Well...” He paused, his eyes shifting again. Was he looking for someone in the crowd? “A sphinx could’ve done those things.”

She waved her wand, and a spiral notebook appeared in her hand. She hastily flipped through the notebook, swearing with each turn of the page. “In the report, it says the husk was eaten, not turned into goo, and there’s nothing about the spices.”

“I didn’t do an inventory of the spices,” he rattled off, the words tripping on his tongue like a mad dash of sprites escapinga jar. “The whole house was trashed, and I’m not sure what that goo was.”

She gave him an incredulous look. “Didn’t you test it?”

He scanned the crowd again, and I knew he was looking for someone. “Our facility isn’t equipped to test human remains.”

“But it is equipped to test pastries?” she pressed.

His cheeks flushed. “Well, yes.”

“Why didn’t you send off the specimen to the DUM headquarters?”

His head bobbled like a doll with a broken neck. “I did.”

“And what were the results?”

He tugged at the collar on his cheap suit like it was suffocating him. No doubt it was, considering his neck was as wide as his head. “They’re pending.”

She gave him a long look, her eyes narrowing. “Shouldn’t you have mentioned that in your report?”

He scratched the back of his bald head, his eyes darting to something behind the sorceress. “I didn’t want to mention it until we had the results.”

She slapped her hand with her wand like a dominatrix about to punish her submissive. “You don’t get to decide what to leave out of the report, just like you don’t get to pick and choose your witnesses!” she hollered. “And you said the husk witness, Gertrude Ledbetter, was tested for spellcasting?”

He tugged at his collar again. “Yes, Your Hon—Mega Resita.”

Mega what?

The sorceress mumbled something about stupid trolls just loud enough for me to hear. “Considering the way you’ve already bungled this case,” she said on a sigh, “forgive me if I don’t believe you used proper testing. I could have you jailed for evidence tampering. If it wasn’t for the fact that pygmy trolls are notoriously stupid, I would call for your immediate arrest.” She paused, sighing again when he loudly sniffled and wipedhis eyes. “I don’t understand how you could examine a crime scene and not check the spices, just like I don’t understand how you could be the lead investigator for a DUM unit. Every other competent witch in the area must have passed on the promotion...” She scowled at me. “Or opened a bakery.” She jutted her wand toward Gus. “While I’m not going to have you arrested, I’m going to recommend your immediate demotion.”

His cheeks turned as red as a dragon’s pecker. “Yes, Your Hon—Megaeray.”

Damn. He wasn’t even trying to get her name right anymore.

I gave a start when that robed figure who’d been sitting behind the sorceress earlier grasped the sorceress’s shoulder and whispered in her ear. She had to have beenSignoraOscura, the advisor.

The sorceress turned up her nose, waving her wand like a conductor. “As far as I’m concerned, based on Miss Lovelle’s testimony and the fact that the lead investigator is obviously biased or stupid, or both, I’m going to recommend dismissal of charges in the Lenny Ledbetter case pending a full investigation into this case from the Southwest DUM division.”

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