Page 74 of Cross My Heart

“Fucking love it,” I admit, taking his right hand and bringing it to my lips. I lick off our cum, my tongue lapping up every drop. “Now go back to your wife, Tyler.” He visibly deflates, disappointment written into his features. “And don’t fucking clean up.”

Tyler smirks. “You want her to see our dry cum all over me?”

“Yes.”

“You want her to know I’m all yours?”

“Please,” I groan when he bites my bottom lip, then sucks on it. When he pulls away, I ask, “What are you doing, Ty?”

Tyler grins. “Reminding you.”

“About?” I frown.

“That I love you,” he breathes. “That I can’t live without you.”

I pause but then give in. “I love you too, Tyler,” I whisper. “I always have, and I’m scared I always will.”

“What can I do to prove to you that I’m leaving her?” he whispers back, pleading with his eyes. He’s desperate for me to believe him, and I’m desperate for him to?—

“Show me.”

“And then?” he asks me.

“I won’t give a damn about her,” I reply, meaning it. I know I should care. I know I should feel bad, and part of me does. But what I feel for Tyler is inevitable. “I’ll be with you.”

Tyler nods. “I’ll show you.” Relief makes my hands shake, and I fist them. “You’ll see.”

With those parting words, he gets up and steps away from me, tucking himself back into his boxers. I do the same, grabbing the cup of water and walking away from him, back to the room. I close the door behind me quietly, locking it for good measure. The last thing I need is for Tyler to sneak into my bed and for Scarlett to find out while she sleeps next door.

I take my anxiety pill and lie down, but my brain won’t stop. My mind spins and spins as I think about him leaving Scarlett. As I think about how much it’s going to hurt her. But tonight solidified something I already knew in the marrow of my bones. I can’t stay away no matter how hard I try, and that makes me weak. But weakness has never felt better. So fuck being strong. That has never worked for me when it comes to him.

And as I close my eyes all I see is curly brown hair, clear-blue eyes, and a blinding smile. I see his face as he comes, lips parted, eyes scrunched closed in ecstasy. I see the way he looks at me from a distance, a grin on his lips. I want him to be mine. Mine to love, mine to hold, just mine. He said he already is.

All I have to do is take him.

Chapter 38

TYLER

For the past two weeks since Noah has been home, I’ve made it my mission to stay up late in hopes he would come out of his room. But even when Scarlett was at work, he didn’t. I don’t know why—maybe he was trying to avoid me. Or maybe he has just been sleeping. Who fucking knows anymore. But I need a repeat of what happened just a few hours ago. This time in his bed, me between his legs, taking his cock in my mouth again. I need him like I need air. And right now? It feels like I’m suffocating.

Every second not spent by his side is an eternity, and I meant what I said to him. I’m leaving her now, and I will spend however long I need making sure he forgives me. I’m going crazy knowing he’s pissed off at me.

Noah will be here for four more weeks, and I’m serving Scarlett papers very soon. Will she hate me and cast me out? Will she ever talk to me again? Will our friendship be ruined forever? But yes, something tells me there’s no going back from this. I’m ready to face the consequences of my actions though. I understand that it’s only fair after everything I’ve done to her. She deserved so much better. She still does. And I just want her to be happy and loved. And I know I can’t give that to her. Not anymore.

As for Noah, I need to make sure we’re in a good place. I hate what I’ve done to us. I want to know that he’s sure about me. As sure as I am of him. But he won’t let me in yet. And I don’t know what it’s going to take. Will leaving Scarlett be enough for him?

I hear a loud whimper and frown, knowing it’s coming from Noah’s room. Is he dreaming again? I’m just about to get up to check on him when Scarlett’s hand wraps around my forearm and tugs me toward her. It takes me by surprise, and I narrow my eyes at her when her fingernails dig into my skin.

“What are you doing?” I ask her through gritted teeth. “Let go, Scar.”

“I could ask you the same thing,” she snaps. “He’s not a child. You don’t need to coddle him.”

“It’s not coddling.” I roll my eyes. “I’m worried about him. He went through something traumatic.”

“He’ll be fine without you.”

The fuck he will. But I don’t say that. Instead, my nostrils flare as I try not to yank my arm out of her grasp. “I’m gonna go jump in the shower.”

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