Page 29 of Cross My Heart

“Okay,” Tyler replies calmly—too calmly. It’s starting to get on my nerves how he’s just doing everything I want. I don’t know why it’s bothering me. I should be grateful he’s being so accommodating. “Let’s get out of here.”

Before I know it, we’ve left the hospital and made it all the way back to his house. The one he shares with Scarlett now. We’re pulled up in the driveway, and I’m staring ahead as he stares at me. I feel his gaze on my face, but I don’t look at him. I don’t dare make eye contact. I know if I do, I’llreallybreak. The ugly parts I keep hidden from sight will resurface, and it’ll scare him. Hell, it’ll scare both of us.

“Let’s go in the back,” Tyler says softly.

“For what?” I frown. “I’m tired, I wanna go to bed.”

“We need to talk, Noah.”

I chuckle humorlessly. “There’s nothing to talk about, Ty. My parents are both dead, and I’m supposed to go back to work in a week.”

“Back,” Ty growls. “Now.”

I roll my eyes and unbuckle my seatbelt, opening the passenger side door and getting in the back instead. He leaves the car on and then climbs back over the center console to join me. I lean back against the seat, my body tense, and my eyes closed. The last thing I want to do is think about what just happened. I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to hear about it. I just want to forget.

“Listen,” I breathe, “I know you think talking is going to help—but it’s not. I just want to forget it ever happened. And you can’t help with that.”

Tyler’s hand comes to my thigh, squeezing. I look over at him, and his eyes are dilated, black swallowing the barely there blue. The darkness washes over his face, and the headlights are turned off. We’re just sitting here, in the dark, while Scarlett waits for him inside. And I know it’s wrong—fuck do I know—but I can’t help but want him to help me forget. To comfort me.

“I’d do anything you wanted, Noah,” Tyler says softly. “Anything.”

“Anything?”

“Yes.”

I take a deep breath as I look at him, my eyes dipping down to his lips. He licks them, and I trail the movement. “Kiss me then,” I reply, and he bites his lip. “It doesn’t have to mean anything?—”

“It will always mean something to me.”

My stomach flutters at those words, but then he’s getting closer, and suddenly my hands begin to tremble from nerves. It’s been two years since he kissed me, two years since I felt his skin against mine. And I’m dying to do it again.

Tyler leans into me, his lips an inch away, and I close my eyes. It’s pretty much an invitation, a dare. And he complies immediately, pressing his lips to mine. It’s soft—too soft—so I suck his bottom lip into my mouth and bite it roughly, tasting blood. Ty groans against my lips, and I soothe the pain away with my tongue, then shove it in his mouth. When our tongues tangle with each other, a moan crawls up my throat, and he pulls away, his chest heaving.

“Gentle, Noah,” he whispers, cupping my face. “Let me take care of you.”

Tyler sucks on my bottom lip softly, then the top one, taking his time. His hands are gentle on my face, matching our kiss, and it feels like there’s a boulder sitting on my chest. I can’t even breathe. But I'd rather die than stop this. When his tongue teases the seam of my lips, I open up for him, and I don’t even recognize the sound that comes out of me. I cup his face too now, desperation making me feel out of control, and I deepen the kiss.

By the time we pull away, our chests are heaving. Tyler’s eyes are wide, and he lets go of me to touch his lips. Mine tingle and a bead of sweat runs down my back. I want to go again. I want him to make me forget, but I feel like something is off.

I look behind me, and there on the driveway stands Scarlett. She’s staring directly at me with daggers in her eyes, and if looks could kill, I’d be six feet under by now. But she doesn’t come to us or make a scene, instead, she shakes her head at me as if she’s disappointed and goes back inside. I wonder if she’s going to say something to him or if she’s waiting to get me alone to cuss me out.

“Oh, fuck,” Tyler whispers. “Did she see?”

“I think so,” I reply with pain in my heart. This is the last thing I needed on the day my parents died. To have Scarlett hate me now too. “I think she did, Ty. I’m so sorry–”

“Not your fault.” But his chest is heaving now, and I can tell he’s freaking out. “Oh, shit. Shit, shit, shit.”

“I’m sorry.” I run a hand down my face in frustration, and he looks like he wants to run away from me. “Fuck, I shouldn’t have asked for that.”

“It’s okay,” he lies, but I’m grateful for it. “It’s okay, baby. I did it willingly. Iwantedto do it.”

“We need to go inside,” I sigh, “I want to go to sleep. I need today to be over.” But even I know I’m not sleeping tonight. I just need some time alone so I can break without an audience. I need to let it all out.

Tyler nods.

I adjust myself in my jeans, trying to hide my erection by tucking myself into the waistband and pulling my shirt over it. We get out of the truck silently, with Tyler going to the driver’s side and removing the key from the ignition. Then we go into the house, and I go straight to the guest room. I don’t look at Scarlett or say anything to her. I just move with purpose. And when I make it to the room and shut the door, I also shut the outside world out.

Just the way I wanted.

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