Page 86 of Cross My Heart

“What are you thinking about?” Tyler breaks me out of my thoughts, and I open my eyes.

The soft glow of the bedside lamp is bathing over us, but he’s turned away from me so I can’t see his face. And right now, I want to. It’s as if he can read my mind too, because he removes my arm from around his waist and flips over to face me. His face is red and blotchy, his eyes puffy and bloodshot, his nose chafed. Yet he looks more beautiful than ever. He looks like he’s finally mine.

“What are you thinking about, Noah?” he whispers, repeating himself.

“You.”

His lips curl into a soft smile that reaches his eyes, and he caresses my cheek gently. I close my eyes at the contact and lean into it. “What about me?” he asks.

“What do you want for your future, Ty?”Do you see yourself with me like I see myself with you?“Where do you want to be in five years?”

“Somewhere with you.”

This time I brush my fingers over his cheek, and he closes his eyes momentarily. When he opens them again, I ask, “Why did you give up your dream of being a teacher?”

“I just didn’t think it was in the cards for me.” He shrugs nonchalantly, but I know he’s anything but that. “Scarlett took priority for a long time, and then my dad gifted me the bar and I felt like maybe that’s what I was meant to be doing all along.”

“And now?”

“Maybe I’ll go back to school.” He smiles, a faraway look in his eyes. As if he’s daydreaming right in front of me. “I have to sell the bar now. So nothing is stopping me.”

“You don’t have to work anymore,” I tell him, and he narrows his eyes at me. “I’ll take care of us. I make more than enough?—”

“I don’t know, Noah,” he whispers. “I don’t want to be a burden.”

“You’d never be a burden, love.” I smile at him. “I want to take care of you. I want you to achieve all your dreams. And you need to study full-time if that’s the dream you want to accomplish. We’re getting old, Ty.”

Tyler smirks. “Oh, fuck off!” But it’s playful, and he shoves me lightly. I grin like a lunatic, and he chuckles. “I’m not getting old yet.”

“Nah, you look better than ever.”

“You think so?” he asks, and I get closer until our noses are brushing against each other.

“You look like a man, Ty,” I say against his lips, and I feel them quirk up with a smile. “You look likemyman.”

His breath catches. “I am.”

Suddenly, I feel vulnerable. I don’t know what comes over me, only that I need to know this more than I need air right now. “Do you regret it?” I ask him in a whisper, afraid he’s going to say yes and shatter me into a million pieces. “Do you regret leaving her?”

“I’ve wanted this for a long time, Noah. I wantyou.” He grabs the back of my neck and presses a chaste kiss to my lips. It feels infinite, yet too short at the same time. “I’ll never regret us. I regret wasting her time and humiliating her the way I did but leaving her was the right thing to do for all of us. No matter how much it hurts, losing her friendship forever.”

A shiver runs through me, my chest fluttering, and I nod. “I want you too, baby.”

“Show me,” Tyler slants his lips over mine once more but doesn’t kiss me. “I want to feel how much you want me.”

I press my lips to his softly, and every time is like the first time we kissed. Electricity runs through my body, and my fingers tingle as I cup his cheek. My stomach flutters with butterflies, and a sigh escapes him as if he’s been waiting for this, craving it as much as I have. As if he’s finally where he’s meant to be.

His tongue teases the seam of my lips, and when it tangles with mine, we both moan. My dick thickens in my boxers, and my nostrils flare as I try to restrain myself. It takes me back in time to a decade ago, a time when things could’ve been—should’ve been. A time when he should’ve chosen me. A time when I should’ve let him. But now he has, and that’s all that matters.

Tyler’s hand reaches out, cupping my dick over my boxers and rubbing it with the palm of his hand. I groan, feeling like he’s about to rock my fucking world, yet remembering how vulnerable he is right now.

“W-w-wait,” I stutter as he bites my lip. “Ty, we can’t.”

“Why the fuck not?” he growls against my lips. “We can finally be together, and you’re going to reject me?”

“No.” I look into his eyes, trying to convey how much I love him. How much he means to me. “You’re just vulnerable right now. I don’t want you to do anything you’ll regret.”

“I’ll never regret you, Noah.” Tyler rubs harder, then grabs me and squeezes. I moan, and he smirks. “I’m finally right where I want to be, where I’mmeantto be.”

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