Page 6 of Reed

“How is that possible? I got a letter saying I was approved for help from the state.” I try to hold back the tears and keep my voice calm, but it’s a challenge.

“You did, but unfortunately, what you were awarded wasn’t enough to cover all the classes you are taking and the books from the bookstore. Honestly, I’m not sure how you got your books.” Lacey starts tapping her pen against the desk, looking everywhere but at me.

“Oh, I see.” I force myself to laugh and smile trying to act like this isn’t a big deal. Even though it is, in fact, a huge fucking deal. “Well, what are my options?” I pull my shoulders back, determined not to break down in front of her.

“Well, we take cash or card,” Lacey says, and something about the way I look at her has her clearing her throat and continuing. “We can also set you up on a payment plan. We can split it into three payments, making the first two one hundred and twenty-one dollars and the last one will be one hundred and twenty. You must make the first payment by the end of next week to stay enrolled.”

“Okay.” Pulling out the pen Reed gave me, I write down all the information on the back of the map.

“Or you can drop a class, and that will leave you with, hold on,” she says, typing away at the computer, “with a refund of fifteen dollars.”

“When do I have to decide whether or not to drop a class?” I don’t want to drop a class because then I won’t be able to get my degree in under two years.

“The paperwork has to be submitted by Monday to receive a full refund for the class,” Lacey says. I make a note of that on the paper. “I’m so sorry. I hate this part of the job.”

“No worries. It’s not your fault. I must have done my calculations wrong or misread the information. I’ll let you know what I choose by Monday. Thank you for your help,” I say, smiling at her. She hands me back my ID, and I turn to leave. Only to be struck dead—again—by the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen.

Can this day get any fucking worse? Standing behind me, listening to everything, is fucking Reed Black. Now the reaction my body had earlier makes complete sense. A blush stains my neck and cheeks. I force myself to take a breath and focus on the door behind him instead of him. Because I don’t want to see the look of pity on his face. “Professor Black,” I say, pushing past him and opening the door.

The small tremors racing through my body are starting to grow and it’s getting harder to hold back the tears in my eyes. Fuck the elevator, I rush down the stairs and out the front door. Sucking in a lung full of air, I don’t stop running until I make it to my jeep. The extra thirty pounds I put on when I was pregnant and haven’t been able to lose feels extra heavy today. I’ve always been a bigger girl. You would think I would have lost some weight with how little I’m able to eat, but I had no such luck. I feel eyes on me, but I don’t pay any attention to that feeling as I start the jeep—which takes three tries—and pull out of the parking lot.

I focus on pulling into traffic and heading toward the food bank instead of breaking down over what just happened. It’s the last place I want to go right now, but the image of my empty fridge at home forces me to swallow my pride. The boys need food, and right now, every little bit I get here helps. We used to get food stamps but when we got evicted I didn’t get the renewal papers and by the time I figured out what was wrong I didn’t want anyone to know that we had no place to live. Since moving, I haven’t had time to fill out the paperwork again. I make a vow to myself to find the time to pick up and fill out an applicationthis week. Once at the food bank, I tell them how many live in my house and the boys’ ages. Which gets me a small bag of clothes and extra fruit.

After driving home, I call Grandmama to check on the boys and decide to get a start on the homework I was given today. Even though I’m exhausted and could use a nap. But tomorrow, it’s a full shift at the diner and then an entire afternoon with the boys, leaving me with zero time to do any of it. I knock out the math questions, read the first two chapters for Business Administration, and try to make headway with my Spanish worksheet before taking a break to make a snack. Throwing two slices of bread into the toaster, I look over the computer class assignment and make a note to see if Grandmama will let me use her laptop tomorrow after work. When my toast is done, I put some butter on it and sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on top. Others might find this disgusting, but it reminds me of Mom and Dad. They would make this as a treat for Caleb and me.

After washing up the dishes—of course, I had to wait for the water to boil—I pick up the mess of toys in the small living room and head back to the table to get started on the paper for Professor Black. Writing has always been something I’ve been good at. I started to journal when I was twelve but stopped when I was fifteen and I didn’t want to relive what happened in order to write about it. Thinking about that time in my life is not good for my mental health so I push away that thought and sit back down at the table. Reed said to write about anything. So, I take a creative approach and write a tall tale about a girl trapped in a cage.

One night a monster stormed a castle, imprisoning the girl that lived there in the dungeons. At night the girl would huddle in the corner of the cage as the monster terrorized her by poking her with sticks and throwing rocks at her. The girl started crying out for anyone in the castle to come to help her,release her or stop the monster. But no one ever came. When she cried the monster grew darker, meaner and would hurt her more. He got great joy from her tears and her pleas to stop.

One night the girl was too tired to cry or beg for the pain to stop. That was the night she figured out if she kept quiet the monster would only throw one or two stones, poke her a couple of times and then leave. So that’s what she did. She stopped and accepted that no one was going to save her. She had to save herself. One night, after the monster left, a dark angel appeared out of the shadows, opened her cage and then left without saying anything. The girl fled through the castle and into the woods. The darkness around her was full of shadows and noises, but she wasn’t scared. No, for the first time, she felt freedom, and she clung to that feeling as she ran to safety.

By the time I’m finished, I have filled two pages front and back, which was more than what Reed assigned, but he never said it couldn’t be longer than one page. So I put my name on the top and placed everything back in my bag. Looking at my watch, I notice it’s almost time for me to leave so I can make it to the bar on time.

I change into my uniform and hope tonight goes by fast without any problems. I still haven’t thought about what I’m going to do about the bill I owe the school, but that can wait until tomorrow. I call the boys and talk to them even though they don’t seem interested in talking to me. I make sure Grandmama is okay with keeping them overnight, which she is.

The whole way to work, I feel that feeling of someone following me, but I don’t see anyone when I look out the windows. I chalk it up to nothing as I pull into the bar parking lot. When I walk in, the bar is half full, but it sounds like we are at max capacity. People are shouting to be heard over the music blaring from the jukebox in the corner. I head to the break room and put my stuffdown. Slipping behind the bar, I greet Tessa, the bartender for the night.

“Hey Ali, how was your first day of classes?” she asks, opening a bottle of Bush and setting it down in front of a customer.

“It was okay. I had a weird moment with my writing professor, but nothing I can’t handle.” I shrug my shoulders and pull on the black apron I’m supposed to wear. Since I’m not twenty-one yet, I can’t tend the bar, but I can be a waitress since we have a small kitchen.

“Define weird,” she says. I spend the next five minutes telling her everything, but I leave out how much he affected me while sitting there listening to him being authoritative. Like when he made Dean leave the room. I don’t tell her that the way Reed’s look and sounded in that moment made my panties wet.

“Definitely weird, but I wouldn’t pay him any mind and focus on your classes.”

“That’s the plan. Well, I better get out there before Mallory fires me,” I say, pointing over my shoulders.

Mallory finds me an hour into my shift and tells me Hailey has quit. She asks me to stay to cover the rest of the night. I agree to stay, but I turn down her invitation to pick up Hailey’s other shifts. I can’t be away from my boys that much even though I need the money.

At two in the morning, after cleaning up my tables and doing my side chores, I pocket my tips and call goodbye to everyone else. Travis, our bouncer, opens the door and falls into step next to me. “Make a fortune?” he asks.

I laugh and slap his arm. “Not even close, but it was a good night, with it being a Tuesday.” We fall into an easy silence while we walk. He waits until I’ve started my jeep before returning to the bar. As I stop at the end of the parking lot, I glance in my rearview mirror for some unknown reason. My eyes widen as I see a dark figure standing beside the bar. The light has beenbroken on that side of the bar for weeks now. Mallory has called the town hall multiple times to ask someone to come out and change it. They say it’s the property owner’s responsibility, but we don’t know who owns the land the pole is on. The figure raises a cigarette, and their face is briefly illuminated by the glow of the cherry.

I can’t make out any distinct features, but something in the back of my mind nags at me that I’ve seen this person before. I blink my eyes to rid the dryness, and the figure is gone when I open them back up. I’m exhausted, so I can’t even be sure if what I saw was real. Figuring I just need some sleep, I pull out and head home. Unaware of the black truck that pulls away from the curb and starts to follow me.

Chapter Four

Reed

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