Page 52 of Mocha Kisses

“I’m trying to help you understand that there’s more to this than just an agency recouping its losses from a family member of the loan. I also want to tell you that I think there’s several people involved that have little to do with Paula’s Agency that have some stake in that loan. How or why, I have no clue.”

My eyes widen at the many instances over the years when the aura around the suited goons changed. Some threatened me with guns. Others just popped up and lingered. A few would disguise themselves as hotel staff or as a patron before catching my eye. The different modes terrified me because I never knew who I could trust.

If what Nova is saying is true, it means that there’s a likelihood that I’ve been running from more than just Paula’s Agency.

“The guns?” I ask, not giving Nova much to work with.

His face contorts with shock and I realize I just told him what kind of danger I’ve been in.Whoops.“You’ve had guns pointed at you? Jesus, Luna. No, Paula’s Agency uses scare tactics for loans. They want to make you feel like you have no way out until either you work for them or pay everything back. Weapons aren’t usually their go-to.”

“Great.”

I chew on my bottom lip, organizing my thoughts on the matter. I don’t even know who I’m running from anymore, which means it makes even more sense to stay. Shuffling closer to Nova, I sigh when he wraps his arms around me, rocking me back and forth as we stand there. No words have to be exchanged and I promise myself that I won’t run again.

Nova shifts and pulls out his phone, throwing me a tight smile when he answers it on speakerphone. Griffin’s panicked voice filters through. “Is she okay? Do you have Luna? Is she here or did she leave?”

“I’m sorry, Fin. I’m so sorry.” I weather my voice, refusing to break down. I don’t deserve these tears.

“Fuck, precious. I thought you left. And I didn’t get to say goodbye.Again.You’re okay, though? Not hurt? Are you coming back to us? I need to see you.” He continues rambling and Nova makes sure to catch my gaze to show me what I’ve broken.

“I’m coming, Fin. Fifteen minutes, tops.”

Nova calms Griffin down long enough to say goodbye before releasing me. “I’m not asking you to trust me, Luna. I’m asking you to give us a chance to protect you before you run again.”

“And when it fails?” It always fails. Never in six years have I found a reprieve and I don’t expect one now.

Nova moves to the passenger side. “Ifit fails, I won’t hold onto you.” He slides in, his words taking a moment to register.

I climb into the driver’s seat, twisting to face him. “I know you’re trying to assuage my fears but I think you just broke my heart. You just said that if it fails you won’t fight for me, Nova."

“And now you know how it feels. You can not have this both ways, Luna. Either you fight with everything you have to stay or you hang on the damn fence and wait for the wind to blow you either way. However, when it inevitably blows onto our side, I won’t be waiting for you. I deal in assurances and you are one of those that I know I want. What do you want?”

He’s repeating himself from before he drove me out here. The difference is that he’s telling me if I continue making them wait, they won’t be here when I ultimately make a decision. It’s not fair to Nova or Griffin or Rome to put them through this without giving them assurances.

“You, all of you.”

“Thenstay.” This time when he says it, it’s not a suggestion. It’s a command. Stay or else I lose everything. I manage a nod and turn on the car before speeding down the road to unite with the other two. Nova reaches across the console and places a firm hand on my thigh. “You focus on Griffin and making sure Yana doesn’t completely derail this book’s launch with her newest marketing tactic while I work on everything else.”

I snort. “Yana isn’t going to derail it. She’s just going to make a mess of our personal lives.” I’m feeling a little less lost and out of control, although I know my tendency to run hasn’t just vanished. I just have more of an incentive to stay. Focusing on that, I speed a little faster toward the apartment.

Griffin

Knowingthatshe’scomingback is a weight off my shoulders but I can’t stop thinking that we could have done something different to keep her from running in the first place. Was she not comfortable? Did we not make her feel safe? Did I not hold her tight enough last night? Maybe it’s because I haven’t told her I love her enough. I know she knows but I need to say it.

“Snap out of it, Griffin.”

I ignore Rome as I continue running through everything I could have done differently. I should have pulled out more memories for us to remake, not the school one. That probably brought back the traumatic day when she left. Fuck, I’m so stupid.

Strong arms band around me, pulling me back against a hard chest. I struggle in Rome’s grip but he only tightens his hold. It feels strange being held like this and comfortable at the same time. The heat of Rome’s chest bleeds into my back, bringing me back to the present. I take several deep breaths as I melt against him, both of us standing in the blanket fort that we constructed last night.

“She’s coming back, Griffin.”

“But she keeps leaving,” I mutter. I twist around in his grip, looking into his amber eyes. He’s just as unsure about this relationship we’ve constructed, even more so after what happened between us.

“Because she’s scared. That doesn’t just disappear. As much as I don’t want to, we have to be patient. And look, she retreated but didn’t run.She’s coming back.” Those words seem to be for him just as much as me, Rome letting out a shuddering breath before dipping his head and brushing his lips over mine. The scrape of his piercings against my skin cause a moan to fall from my mouth. He tenses against me and then lets go, roughly dragging his hands across his head. “Fuck, sorry. I just-”

“I’m not.” When Rome shoots me a weird look, I explain. “Nova said he wasn’t sure why it hadn’t happened earlier.” My cheeks heat at the thought that Nova has been expecting all of this. I take another deep breath and plop onto the couch, eyes darting to the door and then to my phone. They said fifteen minutes but it feels like it’s been an hour. I watch Rome try to find something to occupy himself and while returning to the café is what he should be doing, we both know he’s going to wait for Luna. Pressing my luck, I lean over the back of the couch. “Want to tell me what’s going on?”

Rome stiffens and turns toward me. Despite whatever is growing between us, I can see an emotion in his eyes that hasn’t been present for years. Love. For Luna. I never even saw that with his wife. “What do you mean?”