Page 113 of Imperfect Desires

He kisses the crown of my head.

“I’ve never had this before,” he murmurs.

“This?”

“This… quiet. This kind of stillness.” His voice lowers. “You.”

I turn slightly to look at him. “Do you like it?”

“I love it no matter where you are. It's not just here, watching the sunset with you. I could be on a battlefield and feel peace at the mere thought of you.” He slides his hand to rest protectively over my belly. “Youmoya lyubimaya devushkaare my peace.”

I exhale slowly, emotion tightening my throat. Lev was born for war; he doesn’t flinch at blood and sleeps with weaponscloser than pillows. But when he touches me like this, when he says things like that, he transforms into something more than a soldier. He becomes mine.

“Do you always think of battles?”

“No, but I am always prepared for them.”

“And now?” I whisper.

He leans in close, voice quiet in my ear. “You calm the monster in me, Alina. That doesn’t mean he’s gone. But when I’m with you, he’s quiet.”

I turn to kiss his cheek, fingers threading with his. “I don’t need him gone,” I whisper. “I just need him to know I’m not afraid of him.”

Lev freezes.

Then he shifts, gently but deliberately, until I’m facing him completely.

His gaze burns into me—intense, unreadable.

“You should be.”

“I’m not.”

A beat of silence. Then his mouth crashes into mine—hungry, reverent, a kiss that tastes like the edge of something inevitable.

When he finally pulls away, his thumb drags across my lower lip.

“No one’s ever said that to me,” he murmurs. “No one’s ever wanted both sides of me.”

“I do,” I say, kissing him again. Because with Lev, love is never just flowers and poetry. It’s fire and metal. It’s a promise etched in blood and silence. And I wouldn’t want it any other way.

As the last rays of sunlight softly dip behind the trees, they brush the lake with beautiful shades of deep velvet blue and shimmering silver. Just as I think we might be heading back inside, Lev gently takes my hand and leads me, without a word, toward the dock.

The wooden planks creak beneath our feet, but the world is otherwise hushed. Soft lights strung between poles flicker overhead—tiny golden halos in the dusk. Along the edges of the dock, small glass lanterns float gently on the water, casting broken light onto the waves.

My breath catches in my throat because, at the far end of the dock, a small table awaits us. Two elegant dessert plates rest beneath silver cloches, a glass pitcher of sparkling water stands nearby, and two flutes sit alongside. From somewhere—perhaps hidden speakers nestled in the railing—a faint melody plays. Something soft. Something orchestral. Something that makes my heart ache without knowing why.

Lev doesn’t speak; he just walks me to the center, then stops. I turn to him. I turn to him and find him on one knee.

“I’ve killed,” he says softly. “I’ve bled.”

My chest tightens.

“But this,” he continues, “this is the scariest thing I’ve ever done.”

I blink fast. “Lev…”

He shakes his head, signaling he wants me to let him speak. “I don’t want to merely protect you anymore, Alina. I don’t want to love you only in silence or guilt.”