Page 9 of Lust

My pa would be furious. As would Sheila if she’d heard the way I talked to a customer. I grab a disposable cup from the holder by the large water bottle and fill it to the brim. I guzzle down the freezing cold liquid attempting to temper the fire burning inside me.

What on earth is wrong with me?

I have never had this much trouble being around a guy before, and certainly not two—one of them a reverend no less. Maybe I’m coming down with something and that’s why I feel so hot.

I refill my cup and start drinking as voices reach me.

“Honestly, Suzi, it was so damn hot. I’ve never come so hard in my life.” Her voice lowers, and I place my cup on the draining board and tiptoe to the door but stay out of sight. “He even suggested we look for someone to join us… you know, in the bedroom.”

I hear a gasp, then Suzi says, “Oh my god. Are you going to do it?” I step back from the door as they pause outside.

“I wouldn’t even know where to start with looking for someone. Can’t lie though, the idea of being fuck?—”

I stumble back, knocking a cup on the table crashing to the floor. “Damn!” I mutter and rush to grab the dustpan and brush from under the sink.

The door opens as I crouch to sweep up the broken china.

“Syd, you okay?” Cressida asks as she and Suzi step inside.

Glancing up, I notice as a questioning look pass between them. They’re now wondering if I heard.

Oh, I heard.

“Yeah. Knocked it with my hand as I was passing,” I say, dropping my eyes back to the mess so they can’t see the lie in my words. I quickly sweep the broken cup up, eager to escape the room. After putting the dustpan and brush back, I face Cressida and Suzi as they trade anxious glances.

“So…” Suzi begins, then stops as her eyes lower to my neck. “What happened to your neck?”

My hand automatically reaches for my neck, but I know what’s there. Since I can remember whenever I’m embarrassed or nervous, I get a rash. Like that doesn’t simply heighten my embarrassment and draw further unwanted attention.

“Allergic reaction!” I blurt. The blatant lie slips easily from my mouth, and I hope they don’t question it. Of course, I’m not that lucky, and karma bites me in the backside for telling two lies in the space of five minutes.

“Fuck! Do you need an ambulance? Oh, wait I have some antihistamines. You could go into anaphylactic shock,” Suzi rambles, pacing dizzyingly.

Worried that it’s Suzi who may need an ambulance for a panic attack and heavy with the weight of my lies and guilt of eavesdropping—on yet another conversation—I drop my head in my open palms, hiding my face.

“I lied,” I declare.

My words are met with a stony silence. When nobody speaks after a minute or two, I drop my hands and lift my head. I’m met with Suzi and Cressida’s confused faces beaming back at me.

“I lied. It’s not an allergic reaction.” Their confusion deepens, and it only takes Cressida seconds to work it out.

“You heard us?”

I nod. “Yes. I’m so sorry for listening in on your conversation. And for breaking the cup. And lying.”

“Sydney,” Cress says, coming toward me wearing an easy smile. “It’s okay. You didn’t do anything wrong. Technically, it’s not eavesdropping when people are speaking in a public place.” She winks. “So, the rash is, what?”

“A beacon of embarrassment, basically.” I roll my eyes, feeling foolish.

Suzi laughs. “You’ve obviously never spent much time with Cressida outside work.”

I don’t spend time with anyone outside work, I think to myself.

“Too true. And I think we should rectify that. Come to dinner with us tonight,” Cressida says excitedly.

“Oh. Er…I don’t know…”

“Yes, you do. You’re coming to dinner. Suzi will pick you up on her way, won’t you, Suzi?”

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