Page 34 of Calling the Shots

I’m not going to do this with him again.

As much as I like Mack, I can’t keep putting myself out there. I want to be the cool, casual girl—so much—but I don’t have it in me. Not this time. I’ve been the casual fuck before, but I know I’m worth more that that.

With shaky hands, I tap out a text that I very well may regret in the morning.

Gracelyn: It’s been fun, but I can’t keep doing this with you

I hit send before I overthink the entire situation, knowing deep-down in my heart it’s the right thing to do. Then I stare at my phone, waiting and willing him to text something good back. Tell me what we have is real, I’m not just a fuck-and-roll.

Stalling, I get ready for bed, throwing on my pjs and brushing my teeth. I floss, rinse with mouthwash.

Nothing.

Finger comb through my wild curls, trying to detangle my golden mop.

Nothing.

Apply lip mask treatment and hand cream, including cuticle oil.

Damn it.Still no response.

I crawl into bed and slip under the covers, scrolling through social media for a few minutes to kill time. Finally, I give up and plug in my cell, shut off the light, and stare at the ceiling.

Focusing on my breathing, I try to forget all about Mack and his stupidly handsome face. That square jaw, with just the right amount of stubble. His full lips as he kisses me, licking and sucking and bringing me to the brink of ecstasy. The way his hands brush over my skin and light me up inside. His gravelly voice as he whispers sweet, sweet compliments in my ear.

I squeeze my eyes shut tight, knowing full well that guys like him don’t pick girls like me. I’m not the most beautiful woman in the room. I’m not thin or athletic. I’m short and curvy, with a big mouth and an even bigger personality.

I’m the sidekick, the good-time gal. I don’t give main character energy and I’m certainly not the heroine in a romance. Never have been, never will be. Those roles go to women like Sloane or our friend Lindsey, even Jamie.

But not me.

So why would Mack want anything more than a hookup? I was dumb to entertain the concept, the very idea laughable. He’s probably relieved I let him off the hook.

CHAPTER12

MACK

Tonight didn’t go as planned, that’s for damn sure. For once, I wasn’t going to bail.

For once, I wanted to stay. To lay down with Gracelyn, wake up tomorrow morning holding her beautiful, curvy body in my arms. To kiss her soft, warm lips as the sun beamed into her bedroom, worship her like she deserves.

I wanted to be with her.

But clearly that’s not what she wants. She practically kicked me out before I pulled on my pants, before I could even protest.

And I’m sure as hell not going to beg.

Ego bruised, I’m letting myself into the dark house when my phone lights up.

Firecracker: It’s been fun, but I can’t keep doing this with you

Ouch.

Been fun.

Past tense.

I read and re-read her text, a dull ache in my gut. She let me down easy, I guess.

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