Page 56 of Riot

Mace is right to protect this secret, but my frustration is directed at him.

I can’t fucking look her in the eyes while she’s in the dark. How do I help her move on from her past when I can’t give her the missing piece that would heal her?

She ain’t yours to worry about.

Fuck Mace for saying that.

I ain’t walking away from Ivy, even if it drives a wedge between me and my brother, but to be with her—really be with her—I’ll have to continue this lie.

Can I do that?

The war raging within me between my brother and my woman is chipping away at my sanity.

So, Nicky’s question is an iron fist to my gut because I’m not okay, not even close.

But I ain’t telling him that. Not when he’s carrying so much himself.

“Why wouldn’t I be okay?” I roll my glass between my hands.

Even alcohol provides no joy right now. Two sips and the heaviness of it curdled in my stomach.

“You’ve been sitting here for over an hour with the same glass in front of you.”

He’s been in the room for a fucking hour? I didn’t notice, and that’s an issue.Where the fuck is my head at?In this room, my awareness has to be perfect.

There is no room for fuck-ups when I’m sitting in the lion’s den.

I try to re-centre myself, but all I can think about is Ivy.

She ain’t yours to worry about.

What a load of shit. Even if she never picks me, she’ll always be mine to worry about.

So, why the fuck are you sittin’ here and not with her?

“Why the fuck do you care what I’m doin’?”

“We can’t afford any weak links in the chain, Riot.”

Those words get my attention. I finally look at him, and my back straightens.

There are bruised marks under his eyes, dark smudges as if he ain’t been sleeping, and his shoulders appear heavier than usual. The weight of the kutte on his back seems more like he’s holding up the world on them.

Shit. Guilt steamrolls over me. I’ve not been as present as I should be for him. This fight ain’t his to shoulder alone, and I’ve been so fucking preoccupied that I’ve dropped the ball.

I need to be there for Ivyandfor my club.

“Forget me. Are you okay? You look like shit.”

His gaze drifts over his shoulder in a casual gesture that no one else would notice, but he’s checking to make sure we’re alone. “I’ve got a lot on my plate,” he admits.

That’s an understatement. The gravity of what Nicky is facing would fell even the strongest fucker. Ravage, Nox, and Howler haven’t just made him a part of this revolution—they put him at the head of it.

“You ain’t alone, brother.” I keep my words vague in case anyone overhears.

I’m not taking chances. We have to play the game carefully. If Crank and Grub so much as suspect what we’re doing, all three of us will be face-down in a ditch, our bodies feeding the worms. I ain’t looking to die. Not now. I ain’t leaving Ivy and Seren alone.

I glance over my shoulder, my spine tingling. Grub is staring in my direction.

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