Page 18 of Riot

“It’s okay.” She exhales deeply. “I didn’t expect pregnancy to be so hard. My entire body feels wrong.”

I don’t tell her that my insidesstillfeel wrong after having Seren.

“Just think about the end goal,” I say. “You’ll have a beautiful baby, and all of this will be some kind of fever dream.”

Riot snorts, and I shoot a glare at him.

“I don’t know why we don’t lay eggs.” Maylie groans. “It would be easier than having to incubate a baby for nine months and then push that baby out of a hole that, despite what everyone says, really is not big enough for what it’s designed to do. I mean, what genius thought this was the best method of continuing the human race? There definitely has to be a far better way, right?”

Beneath the rambling, fear threads through her tone. She’s rattled, and I get it. Giving birth felt like dying and being reborn in the same breath. The only thing that got me through it wasknowing it would eventually end—that, and the litres of gas and air I was sucking back like they were oxygen.

“It’s the perfect size, May. Our bodies are made to do this.” That lie burns. Biology be damned, it still hurts like hell. “I got through it, and so will you.”

“I’ve never been more grateful to be a man in my entire life,” Riot mutters.

Maylie cracks one eye open, her glare venomous. “Riot, you know I love you, but if you keep talking, I will stab you with my fork.”

Her toothy smile unsettles me. I gently pry the fork out of her hand and slide it out of her reach.

“No maiming him, even if he’s being an ass.” I shoot Riot a look that promises violence, but the dimples come out again and heat curls low in my belly.

He’s going to be the death of me.

“I don’t think I can do this,” Maylie whines.

I don’t point out that it’s too late to change her mind because logic is not going to fix this. She needs assurance and comfort.

“You’ll have Mace with you every second of your labour. You’ll be fine.”

She groans dramatically. “I love Mace, but honey, he’s going to be a nightmare. The second I’m in pain, he’ll lose his mind. I need calm heads in the room. I want you with me too.”

My lips part, and my eyes go wide. I don’t try to mask my shock.She wants me?My fiercely independent sister wants me to be her birthing partner?

A lump swells in my throat.

“I’ll be wherever you need me,” I say, and I mean every word.

My sister was hurt because of me, and that guilt gnaws at my gut every day. I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to fix it, but ten lifetimes won’t be enough to make it right.

I can live with what was done to me. I can survive the nightmares and soul-crushing terror. But Maylie didn’t deserve any of it.

“Hey,” my sister squeezes my hand, “whatever that look on your face is, stop it.”

She sees too much, but then she always has. “It’s nothing. I’m just thinking about how stressed Mace is going to be.”

She doesn’t believe me, and my eyes burn. The mask is slipping, and I’m not ready to let it fall.

“Ivy?” Her voice is thick, weighted with concern.

“I’m fine,” I lie again. It’s all I seem to be doing lately. “I’m just tired. It’s been a long few nights. Seren isn’t sleeping.”

Another lie. My daughter is sleeping better than I am right now.

“Do you want me to have her for a few hours so you can rest?”

My beautiful, selfless sister. “You’re literally green, Maylie.”

She waves this off. “It’s just a little nausea.” Her gaze slides to Seren, softening. “You’re doing such a great job with her. I hope you know that.”

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