Page 25 of Must Have Been Love

Dr. Methi 1. Hudson Fitzgerald 0.

The story of my life right now.

eight

HUDSON

We make the last ferry back to Liberty by the skin of our teeth. I had to make some business calls from the car after our therapy session and then we went to Ayda’s favorite diner for dinner, where she proceeded to fall asleep over her half-eaten sundae. So I carried her back to the car and fastened her into her car seat and let her rest while I made the trip back to the dock. Once aboard, I made a couple more calls and replied to some emails that my assistant marked as urgent.

Ayda lets out a soft snore – another sound that isn’t talking – and I look back at her to check that she’s okay. Her eyes are closed, her eyelashes fluttering against her pink cheeks. She looks so damn peaceful it makes me feel wistful.

I don’t think I’ve ever been that relaxed in my life.

Needing some fresh air, I open the door and climb out of the car, inhaling the night ocean air. It’s warm and salty and somehow centering.

From the corner of my eye I see Jesse wave at me. He’s one of the island kids that stayed here – there aren’t many of them. Most leave at the first chance. I know I did. I went to college then grad school and ended up in New York working for an investment firm before striking out on my own.

And one by one my brothers and then my sisters left too. Now Autumn and I are back.

“Nice night,” Jesse shouts out.

“Sure is.” I nod at him. I don’t know Jesse that well. He’s more Autumn’s age than mine. But I know his family and I know they have their secrets the way all families do. But they’re not my concern, not really.

“Gonna go get ready to moor up,” he calls. “Last run of the night.”

“Sure.” I nod, taking one last breath of the freshest air before I climb back into the car and close the door softly so I don’t disturb my kid. I look out of the windshield at the approaching island. The houses are all lit up in the center of town, but darkness surrounds it. In the distance, I can see the glow of the lamps that lead to the hotel, and to the right, the lighthouse.

Where Autumn and Parker are. Probably all cozy and in each others’ arms. I push that horrifying thought out of my brain.

Bringing my gaze back to the main town in front of me, I see the light blazing in the living quarters of The Salty Dog.

Wheresheis.

If I close my eyes I can see her in picture-perfect detail. The dark, glossy hair that falls in a tumble of waves past her shoulders. The golden skin that comes from genetics, not a spray bottle or too many hours spent in the sun. And those lips that seem to taunt me no matter where I am or what I’m trying to do.

Especially at night when I’m trying to fall asleep.

“Just be kind to yourself.”

Dr. Methi’s words echo around my head. Right now I’m not sure if being kind to myself would be paying Skyler Brown to leave this damn island for good, or fucking her until we’re both breathless and sweaty.

All I know is I don’t like this feeling of being out of control. I don’t like anything that pierces my strictly regimented life. My only concerns are Ayda and my family, everything else doesn’t matter.

I’m so deep in thought that I don’t hear the knock on my window until Jesse raps his knuckles on the glass a second time. I press the button to lower it, and he leans in, an easy smile on his prematurely sun weathered face.

“Hey,” he says. “I meant to ask you, have you met her yet?”

“Met who?”

“Skyler.” His eyes light up as he looks over at the bar.

I follow his gaze to The Salty Dog. “Yes. You?”

“Only when she got on the ferry over here. It was pouring that day so I didn’t get a chance to say hi.”

It dawns on me. “You didn’t tell her?”

He shakes his head. “No.”

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