Page 133 of Must Have Been Love

“Hudson.” I put my hand on his chest. Damn this material is thin. I can feel the heat of his skin through it. It’s completely distracting. “Did you hear me? I’m pregnant. About eight weeks or so, I think. I haven’t seen a doctor yet, just had the blood test done. Dr. Methi told me. The day Ayda disappeared. I was so shocked and… I got distracted.”

“You’ve known since then?” His brows knit, like the words are finally sinking in.

I nod.

“And you had to carry this all alone?” He looks almost sick. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry you had to do that.”

“I think I’m going to keep it.”

“Good.” He nods. “That’s good.”

“Is it? Are you listening to me? I’m pregnant.” I’m beginning to think his brain is addled from the karaoke and wig.

He grins. “I know. You told me. At least three times now. Congratulations.” He pulls me close, holding me.

“Congratulations to you, too,” I whisper. “Are you sure you understand. Are you okay with this?” I don’t think I’ll ever understand this man.

He looks down at me, his expression full of wonder. “Of course I’m okay with it. The question is are you okay with it?”

I nod. “I am. It took me a few days, but… here I am. Not drinking caffeine, taking prenatal vitamins. Trying to work out how to tell you that I missed a birth control pill.”

He starts to laugh and I’m still stupidly confused. “Are you drunk?” I ask him.

“Only on you.”

I start to laugh with him, because this is all so bizarre. And he’s clearly not thinking straight.

“Do you know what Dr. Methi told me the other day?” he asks.

“That your brain doesn’t work properly?”

He grins. “No. He told me something I haven’t stopped thinking about. That my job as a partner is to understand, not to control.” He drops to his knees in front of me, putting his face against my stomach. Kissing it. “We had sex, we made a baby. I don’t just understand, I love it.” He looks up at me. “I love you.”

My throat feels scratchy. “I love you too,” I whisper.

“Take me back,” he says. “Let me understand you. And not control you. Every day. Twice on Sundays.”

I laugh. “Yes. Yes please.”

He pulls me down to the sand, so we’re both kneeling. His hands cup my face, angling it slightly so his lips can press easily against mine. His kiss is soft, sure. And so deep it makes my toes curl.

“You know I kind of like you being controlling sometimes,” I whisper against his mouth. “In bed at least.”

“And out of bed?”

“That’s when I get to be in control.” I grin at him. “Bedless sex, it’s a thing.”

“It is.” He nods solemnly. “And I’m looking forward to the next time we try it out.”

* * *

HUDSON

“Ready?” I ask Ayda, who’s next to me, holding my hand. She looks up at me and nods, her face glowing.

She’s going to be a big sister and she has no idea. And we won’t be telling her yet. But we will when the time is right and we’ve talked it through with Dr. Methi.

I hit send on the message.

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