Page 33 of Isle of Pain

Sometimes I forget that Nico is my cousin’s brother-in-law, now. They must have grown close since she moved here last year. But even in a day, anyone would know Giulia Moretti is the most stubborn Leo they’ll ever meet.

I pick up the phone. “Hello?”

“Hello? Hello?! That’s all you have to say for yourself, Marie Louisa Annabelle? You’ve been here a week and I heard that only today? Dragged it out of my husband’s mouth with my feminine guiles? Explain yourself,ciucciarella.”

“Don’t call me that, I’m not a baby!”

“Then don’t act like one,” she counters but it lacks heat. She’s teasing me but somehow, this is the familiarity I’ve been craving for so long and never managed to touch. I smile and I’m about to answer when she continues, forever the drama queen. “Do I have to come to you or will you deign grace me with your presence, your majesty?”

“Come on, Gigi, don’t be like this.”

“You wound me mortally.”

“Okay, why don’t you come over here? Ember is awake and everything I need is here and I just—I don’t know. I needed a break, you know?” My voice breaks. I’m so tired of shedding the same tears over and over.

“Of course, babe. But you should have told me. I’m right here. I’m always here for you, you know that.”

My entire family has always been there for me, without ever being there. The dichotomy of what they said and what they showed was too hard to sustain, and now, I don’t know if I cantrust my cousin, my own blood, to be there forme. Only me. Not snitch to my sister about my whereabouts, though she knows I’m here, of course. Not convince me to go back to Kalliste or give my daughter up.

“I’ll bring wine,” Giulia says and my ribcage becomes too tight. My fingers itch with the need to raise a glass to my lips. I turn my gaze to Nico but he didn’t hear. I don’t want him to see me drink. He’s the only one who knows but he’s also the only one I want to impress. With my family, hiding my little problem is more a case of not wanting them to scold me and berate me, treat me more like a child than they already do. With Nico, everything is different. New and not yet spoiled by years of resentment, lies by omission and abandon.

“Sure, I’m not doing anything special today,” I tell her and we hang up quickly.

I haven’t seen Giulia since the funeral and, maybe because she isn’t one of my sisters, or because she has a new family now and isn’t the epitome of loyalty to the Morettis only, she’s less pressure for me. And she’s bringing what I need.

Nico disappears into his bedroom and reappears seconds later with an object in his hands. Without a word, he sits next to me on his comfortable couch, facing the bay window overlooking the dark green forest surrounding his house. The view is breathtaking and so peaceful, so different from the turquoise and cyan of the Mediterranean Sea from my window on Kalliste. The field of Scottish Bluebells is the only pop of colour but somehow, they don’t trigger me.

He opens his hand to reveal a thin gold bangle. It’s an elegant piece, finer than any jewellery I’ve ever allowed myself to get or wear. My mother always offered for me to borrow some of her precious golden ornaments but I never dared, I never thought it would do anything for me. And with my formal clothes, I always looked too serious anyway, I didn’t want to add the braceletsand necklaces to it. But I never dared to wear any of the grunge chains and metal Lisa would buy either. Always stuck in between.

“It’s beautiful, Nico. Is it for Giulia? She’ll love it,” I tell him. I almost dismiss this entire moment but he frowns again and I do a double take.

“Marie, this is not for Giulia. This is for you.” He says it like it’s obvious. There’s nothing obvious about being offered a beautiful bracelet by a man who makes my heart pound and my core heat. There’s nothing casual about this moment while my daughter looks on with little stars in her shiny green eyes.

“Why?” I ask, unsure. I don’t deserve it.

“It’s a tracker.”

“What?” I jump back. “Are you mad?” I’m close to losing my shit but Nico shrugs.

“Everyone I care about has one. Giulia in her wedding ring, Andrea around his neck, my mother, in earrings she never removes even for sleeping. I need to get to work this afternoon.” His eyes harden and I don’t need to ask what work means. Nico and Andrea are both in on Lana’s war against Moscow and even without the threat on the horizon, Nico kills for a living. He hasn’t said it but it’s an inner knowing I can sense in my bones when I look at him. Especially when the warm honey of his eyes disappear in dark pools of bloodlust like now. “I need you to wear this so I can know you’re safe.”

“I’m only going to be with Giulia, I’m safe.” I try to reason with him but his resolve is solid as steel. He stands and walks in front of me.

“I’m not leaving until you put it on, Marie. I’m not taking risks with your safety. We did with Giulia, and—” He stops himself mid-sentence and my hackles rise. I never heard about anything happening to Giulia.

“What happened to Giulia?” I ask, taking on my commanding tone I know he didn’t resist before. It’s no use.

“That’s not for me to tell.” Ember babbles at our feet and he glances down, his eyes softening, before he looks up to me again. “Please, Marie. Wear this. There’s a hidden lock, here.” He shows me how to close the bracelet and gently open it again in a hidden mechanism. “It’s important to me. The tracker is linked to my phone. I need to know you’re safe,” he repeats.

My shoulders sag and I nod, holding my wrist so he can lock the bangle around it. When the lock clicks into place, butterflies take flight in my stomach. I must be losing my mind.

“What about my daughter?” I ask, because I can’t bear to think Nico wouldn’t include her in the people he cares about.

His lips curve and his smile broadens until he gets a small box from the coffee table I hadn’t noticed before. I can’t blame myself, it’s not every day that I get offered a tracker. Even my father never suggested it—though maybe he should have, considering there have been two kidnapping attempts against Angèle and Lana, and one against Lisa and I.

He opens the little carton box and takes the cutest blue little baby shoes from it, Mary-Janes, holding them proudly, and showing the tracker inside the small buckle.

“It took me a few days to think of it because I read a lot about babies and jewellery and it’s not recommended for little ones younger than three to have them. Some have their ears pierced but I noticed when you arrived that Ember doesn’t and I didn’t want to suggest something you wouldn’t be comfortable with. So shoes seemed like a good idea.” He holds them to me and pink rises on his cheeks like he’s proud and shy all at once. He’s so goddamn cute, my eyes water.

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