Page 98 of The Devil and His Goddess

I let out a shaky breath, remembering the brief sparkle that had lit up Harper’s eyes as she’d talked about her favorite holiday. For that fleeting moment, Harper had started to come back. She had almost reached the surface when the darkness dragged her back under the turbulent waves.

I looked around my vast living and kitchen space. The room was grand in its design while simple in decor. What itwasn’twas decorated for the upcoming holiday. I never gave the time or energy into any holiday, but …

“Aiysha,” I called over to her as an idea popped into my head.

The dark-skinned human met my gaze.

“I might have an idea,” I hedged. “I don’t know if it will help her, but anything is worth trying. I’ll need your help, though.”

She listened as I explained what I had in mind, and the more I talked, the more her own face lifted with renewed hope. She eagerly agreed and immediately shot to her feet, impatient to get started on her part of the plan.

I was excited, too, but I couldn’t seem to gather the same wind in my sails as her. As she left and I cleaned up the kitchen alone, the weight of Harper’s suffering continued to press into my chest and shoulders.

What if this new idea didn’t work?

What if it only hurt her more?

What ifIhurt her with all of my stupid attempts at helping her?

I couldn’t stomach it anymore. I couldn’t bring air into my lungs, couldn’t find the ability to think, couldn’t come up with an answer as to what to do. My head spun with my own lack of energy as I stumbled through my quiet house. I barely recognized the sound and feel of my phone vibrating.

“Hello?” I answered weakly, clutching my pounding head in my hand.

“Pers,” Zagan responded on the other end. “Can you come over? There’s some stuff we all need to talk about. The others are already here.”

I didn’t respond. The lump in my throat had grown too large. I hung up and stepped through shadows, coming out on the other side in Zagan’s windowed ballroom. The four demons waiting there turned to me just as my legs gave out, and I sank to the ground like a man who’d finally reached his breaking point.

Because I had.

I broke apart.

“Perseus!”

My name came from three of the four demons, but I barely heard them past the pounding in my skull or rushing of blood in my ears. Everything inside of me snapped into fragments.

“Fuck, man,” Dante gasped as he dropped by my side.

“What the fuck happened?” Xander demanded as he grabbed my shoulders and knelt in front of me.

“Pers, talk to us,” Zagan snapped frantically as he got on his knees at my other side.

My eyes burned as I squeezed them shut. The broken shards of myself tore at my throat as I revealed the pieces for all to see.

“I don’t know what to do,” I growled, taking in a hard breath. Shaking my head, I repeated roughly, “I don’t know what to fucking do! Harper ishurting, and I—I don’t know what todo.”

Dante, Xander, and Zagan were quiet as I shook and splintered into despair before them.

My demonic form came out as I lost the strength to hold it back, and I raked my clawed hands through my hair to tug on the roots. “I should’ve stopped him. I should’ve fucking stopped him. But I was such a fucking idiot, thinking he had no real power. A human like him wouldn’t dare go up against ademon. I thought being a demon made me stronger than him.”

“We are stronger.”

At the sound of Coldin’s deep timber, I looked up. He stared down at the rest of us on the ground. The Letum demon wore a blank expression as he restated, “Demons are stronger.”

I closed my eyes and let out a shaky breath. “I thought so. I mean, we have the power of Hell on our side. We have all these great abilities that make our strength far greater than anything a human could do. I thought I was stronger. Until I realized that power meansnothingwhen the person you care about gets hurt. Because you thought wrong. Because you were arrogant. Suddenly, you’re the weakest one in the entire goddamn room.”

Coldin’s pierced lip twitched in the start of a confused frown, but his indifference won out, keeping his face blank.

I dropped my head again, plagued with guilt and questions that couldn’t be answered. For all of my demonic power, why couldn’t I stop this? Why couldn’t I protect her? Why couldn’t I take her pain away?

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