Page 74 of Hot Shot

A nod, a small smile. “Yeah. I’m just…I don’t know. Thankful, I guess, that she sees me that way. I hope it’s not just because she’s young, you know? That she’s feeling like that’s what she’s supposed to do.”

“I’m sure that’s part of it. But I’m also sure she wants a daddy. And so far, you’ve done a bang-up job. You’ve already started to earn her trust, and that’s huge.”

He’s quiet for a beat. “And how about you? Have I earned yours?”

I’m unprepared for the question. Unprepared forhim.I fumble around for an answer that doesn’t give me away.

“You’re getting there,” is my final answer, and I praise myself for keeping my cool.

Wilder’s shoulders relax, his eyes softening with his smile. “Hmm, maybe I need to work harder. Did the kiss at the ballpark help me or hurt me?”

“No comment.”

“Seemed like it helped,” he continues. “You don’t have any trouble pretending we’re together.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I say, taking a theatrical bite with hard eye contact.

His gaze slips to my lips. “You need me to say it out loud? I’ll bite.” He sets his fork down, all of a sudden serious, and myheart stops. “There’s something between us, and it’s anything but pretend.”

Heat slips across me, slow and delicious, pooling in my belly, sinking lower. “Of course there’s something between us—once upon a time, we loved each other so fiercely, we got married knowing we couldn’t be together. I remember how it felt. We’ve been through too much for there to benothingbetween us. But we can’t do anything about it.”

Wilder inches forward in his seat, pinning me with his eyes. “Tell me why.”

I swallow hard, not so sure of myself with him looking at me like that. “Because I said so,” I answer, not wanting to talk about it.

“Are you still mad at me?”

“No,” I admit.

A triumphant fire ignites behind his eyes. “What else do you want me to prove?”

“It’s not you.” He’s calm, still, so intense I squirm under the weight of his gaze while he waits for me to spill. “What if I’m not ready?”

“What if you are?” When I scoff, he says, “Look, if you weren’t ready, you’d know. You’d feel it in your gut like a kick drum. And if the thing that sets off the drum is the big stuff, the deep stuff, then it doesn’t have to be big and deep. There are a hundred different ways we could be together, and it only has to be as serious as you want it to be.”

“Oh, really?” I set down my fork and fold my arms. “And you’d be okay with that?”

“You know what I want, Cassidy? What Ireallywant?”

I’m terrified to answer, so I just keep glaring.

“I want to take care of you. I want to keep you safe and make you happy, whether that means getting you a snack and tucking you into bed or fucking you stupid.”

Blood rushes to my cheeks. “Wilder.”

“Tell me something, Cass—when was the last time you were fucked?”

My mouth pops open. “Wilder!”

Not only does he not back down, he leans in.

“Cassidy. When was the last time you weretrulyfucked? Fucked stupid and useless and feral. Fucked so hard, so real, you forgot where you existed in space-time. When was the last time he needed you and you needed him with the kind of desperation that breeds bad decisions?”

It’s a thousand degrees, and my panties are ruined. The last time I was truly fucked it was by Wilder, and he knows it. I don’t know how he knows, but he does.

Somehow, I find my tongue and am able to successfully use it. “This sounds more like it’s about you getting what you want than me.”

“The only way this is about me is because your happiness will make me happy. What I want comes second to that. If all you want is for somebody to fuck a decade of frustration out of you and tuck you into bed with a snack, let me be the first to tell you I amherefor that.”

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