Page 28 of Hot Shot

-Ashley

I lower the letter, leaving it hanging between my knees. I drop my face to my free hand, elbow on my thigh, tears biting at the corners of my eyes.

What am I supposed to do? I don’t know what to do.

Ashley thought you’d know.

Yeah, well, Ashley hasn’t spoken to me in seven years. How right could she be?

A little girl’s laughter floats from the kitchen, a sound I’ve never heard before but somehow know, and a woman’s laugh that I know better than my own. When I raise my heavy head, I see them at the island, bent over bowls of ice cream, grinning at each other.

“I need to talk to my wife,” I finally say, the words dragged through sandpaper.

They nod. Patty squeezes Paul’s hand before she stands and puts on a smile. She heads for the kitchen and I follow, watching Cass. She finally looks at me when we approach.

I jerk my chin to my bedroom.

She nods once, then smiles at Cricket. “Be right back.”

Patty sits next to Cricket and asks her about the ice cream as Cass and I walk to my bedroom. Once she’s in, I close the door behind us.

Cass doesn’t stop until there’s a good distance between us, and when she turns, she folds her arms. Her face is touched with more concern than rage, so at least I have that going for me. Her brows have angry little brackets between them, but her eyes are soft.

“Are you okay?” she asks quietly.

“No. Are you?”

“Not even a little.” A pause. “You didn’t know.”

“I didn’t know.” I sink into the chair in the corner and bury my face in my hands, unable to process this.Anyof it. Ashley’s dead. She had my baby. She never told me. That baby is sitting in my kitchen, and I’m her father.

I’m her father. And I’m supposed to take care of her. But I don’t know how.

I don’t know anything.

I feel Cass approach, sense her hesitation before she lays a hand on my back.

When my hands drop, I stare at her shoes, seeing nothing. “Ashley wanted me to take her if anything happened. Her grandparents are old, and Cricket can’t live in their retirement community for more than two weeks at a time. School is starting and they want her to get registered so she doesn’t have to switch schools. They’re too far away to commute her, it’s an hour drive one way.”

“Jesus.”

“There’s more.”

A pause.

“Because I was so wild when we were together, Ashley has a stipulation in her will that I have to either be in a committed relationship or married and able to provide a stable home environment for Cricket. And I have to prove it in court.”

“What…?” she asks quietly.

“Here.”

The letter is still in my hand. I offer it to Cass.

As she’s reading, her hand moves to her mouth. Slowly, she sits on the ground, leaning against the chair I’m in. I currently have zero permission to touch her, but I want to. I thread my fingers and squeeze, twisting a little to keep them occupied.

“Married.” From her lips, the word is flat, thin.

“Married.”

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