Page 148 of Magic or Madness

“Seven,” he whispers, and I cock my head to the side, unsure of what he means.

Then, I realize what he’s referring to, and my first reaction is to comfort him, but instead, I’m hit with a fucking missile, nearly knocking me to the floor. For the first time, I have something to add, rather than only offering consolation.

“One,” I say, our gaze locking in the saddest moment we’ve shared so far.

“Oh, Bambi.”He rakes his hands through his wet hair, turning his back on me, and I begin to feel the weight of what I’ve done.

I stabbed a man in the neck, stealing his ability to breathe, and stopping the blood from circulating through his body, leaving it discarded in the dirt. Maybe he had a life, and a family waiting at home, but so did I, and I don’t regret my choices.

It was us or him, and I choseus.

“He kidnapped you, Fallon. If anything, it was self-defense,” he says, his back still turned away from me.

“I don’t regret what I did, Ozzy.” Those words trigger him, and he faces me once again, taking my face in his hands.

For the first time, I notice deep gashes on his knuckles, and I trail my fingers over the scabs.

“I’m proud of you,my beautiful girl. You saved us, and you survived. If you need to talk about it, or his face haunts you in your dreams … we’ve all been there, alright?” He says sternly, and I know he’s trying to ease me into this.

I’ve stepped across another threshold, crossed another boundary, and now, we’re murderers.Both of us.

We both killed a man today, basically together, and there’s no turning back from that.

Something about it doesn’t scare me, though. After everything I’ve been through with Ozzy, and the crew, maybe even going back to the days with my stepfather, it feels like I’ve been chasing the inevitable. Like I’ve been following a path I was meant to take.

“I know, baby. I’m going to be alright,” I tell him, and he nods, always believing in me.

I take his hands, kissing each spot that’s been damaged, and I know he did this because of me.

“What happened, baby?”

He sighs, searching for the words, and I give him the space to work through his emotional turmoil.

“I held it together for a long time, Fallon, like well into the next day, but when the anger took over, I had to let it out. Finally, when the blood was gushing out of my hands, I felt something. For the first time since you’d been taken, I feltyou. I remembered when we did this,” he pauses, placing my handon the B carved into his chest, then he reaches down, his fingers brushing the heart on my thigh.

My pulse races, and I’m transported back to that moment wheneverything changed. That euphoric feeling was unlike any high I’ve ever experienced, and I would do it again in a heartbeat.

“And how it solidified our choice to be together. The sight of blood gave me the clarity I’d been searching for, and somehow, it gave me the insight to know that you were okay. This blood oath connects us in more ways than we knew, and it means that I’ll never stop protecting you, loving you, and taking care of you. Whatever that looks like,” he finishes, and I pull him down by the nape of his neck, placing a kiss on his cheek.

“Why didn’t you want to talk to me?” I ask, the words tumbling out before I can stop them.

“I couldn’t, Bambi. The second I heard your voice, I knew I’d lose it. If you cried, or I heard that small crack in your voice that happens when you’re biting your lip, I’d go on a rampage. Shooting anyone who dared to put their hands on you. Oliver was the second-best choice.” He made the right decision based on how well he knows me, and it wasn’t only my life on the line, we were all under fire.

The sobs tear through me again until Ozzy is holding me up, and lowers us to the floor.

I’m crying because of his grace, and how good he is to not only me, but everyone in our life.

I’m crying because I was kidnapped, and he had to hold everyone together, not just himself.

Ozzy was born to be a leader, and he does right by every single one of us, no matter how badly he’s hurting.

“I heard you. You were listening,” I say softly, the final wave of tears slowing down.

“Like an oath, Bambi.”

He holds his hand out to mine, and I interlock our fingers, smiling when our tattoos touch. It’s everything our love resembles, these small sayings and places on our bodies that double as connections to each other’s soul.

“Sacred prayer, baby,” I whisper, and he holds me tightly until the water runs cold.

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