Page 147 of Magic or Madness

This job, this client, this man, has stolen so much from me, and it’s put a serious disconnection between Ozzy and me. I need to forget, at least for a little while, and be with the one person who can make me whole again.

“Can we just … not talk, Ozzy? Please,” I beg, and his eyes search until they find mine.

“Come here, Bambi,” he whispers, pulling me onto his lap and my ass lands on the steering wheel, reminiscent of the first time he took me for a ride in this truck.

My mind wanders back to a simpler place when everything was okay, nothing hurt, and there wasn’t a thousand pounds of trauma weighing me down.

I wrap my arms around his neck, burying my face into his shoulder, and I breathe him in, not taking a second of his embrace for granted. His arms hold me tightly, and our heartbeats have synced, thumping against our chests in a perfect rhythm, and finally, I feel connected to him again.

“Let me take you inside, take care of you?” He asks, and I agree, letting him carry me.

I latch onto him with no intention of letting go, my body feels weak against his, but I let him be my strength, transferring everything I have left inside me to him.

“Fallon!” I hear a chorus of people calling my name, but I can’t move, I’m stuck to Ozzy, not mentally strong enough to face everyone right now.

As if he read my mind, he asks everyone for space and promises that we’ll come to see them in a little while.

“Thank you,” I whisper, and he brings me into the bathroom, locking the door behind us.

He gently places me on the counter, and I reach my hand out to brush the stray curls out of his face.

“I didn’t think about you.” I feel so bad for forcing myself not to think of Ozzy, for pushing him so far out of my mind to gather information, that I have to tell him.

It’ll eat me alive if I don’t, and I can’t hold onto things that hold me down. He doesn’t take his eyes off me, listening as I work through the emotional trauma I was put through.

“I had to push you out of my mind to survive, to not break down. I was terrified that if I thought about how you were doing without me, it’d destroy me, and I needed to be strong. Now, you’re holding me, looking at me like that, and I feel so fucking guilty. I’m so sorry, Ozzy. You’re the only thing I wanted to fightfor, to be strong for, but thinking about you would’ve been the reason I died,” I cry, the tears streaming down my cheeks like a waterfall.

Ozzy pulls my head against his chest and presses soft kisses everywhere he can reach.

“It’s alright, Bambi. You’re alive, and unharmed, that’s all that fucking matters. Nothing you do, or don’t do, will ever make me love you less,” he whispers, using the pad of his thumb to brush away my tears.

I look up at him, and he’s fighting back tears, attempting to hold himself together for my sake, so I cup his cheek, pulling him close to me.

“I’m okay, I’m not going to break into a million pieces,” I say, and finally, he looks at me like he used to.

Just like the day in the diner, and a million times since, his eyes are full of love, rather than fear or pity, and I know instantly that we’re going to be alright.

“Can I kiss you, Bambi? I need you,” he says, the vulnerability in his voice breaking my heart.

I nod, and he wastes no time, gently connecting my lips to his.

I take his face in my hands, keeping him as close to me as possible, and this kiss is taking away all the pain we’re both holding onto.

“You know I love you, right?” I smile as he breaks his lips off mine, a deep sigh leaving his chest as we both attempt to catch our breath.

“God, Fallon, I love you so much. I’m sorry, I just … can’t believe you’re really home and in my arms. It’s surreal,” he says, pressing his forehead against mine.

“It’s trauma, Ozzy. We’ve been through something traumatic, but we’re going to heal together,” I tell him, my confidence returning now that we’ve broken through this wall.

“You’re right. You’re always right – one of the millions of reasons why I can’t survive without you,” he whispers, his words lighting up one of our darkest moments.

“I’ll make you a deal,my Greek God, we talk this out once, and then move forward,” I bargain, and he agrees, pulling me off the counter.

He turns the hot water on, a sly smile on his face as he searches my eyes before removing my clothes. I’ve been in his sweatshirt and the same leggings for I don’t even know how long, but I need to scrub every memory of this shit, wash it down the drain, and forget it ever happened.

I watch Ozzy step under the water, ensuring it’s the perfect temperature before pulling me inside the tub with him. He takes the shower head down and sprays me until I’m completely soaked, dirt and dried blooding swirling down the drain.

I wrap my arms around him, our bodies slick yet connected, and I couldn’t imagine a better way to heal than with this perfectly made-for-me man.

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