Page 17 of Body and Soul

I stood there, staring at the industrial metal door, my hand raised to knock. This was a mistake. Shepherd wouldn't want to see me like this, a pathetic mess who couldn't even keep a fast food job. He had better things to do than deal with my problems.

But where else could I go? The apartment wasn't safe, not with the Children sniffing around. And I couldn't face Cherry, couldn't let her see how far I'd fallen.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I popped my last hard candy into my mouth and rapped my knuckles against the door, the sound echoing down the empty street.

For a long moment, nothing happened. I was about to turn away when I heard the scrape of a deadbolt and the door cracked open.

A woman appeared, her pink hair pulled back in a messy bun, ink smudged on her cheek like a badge of creativity. Her eyes widened when she saw me. “Can I help you, sweetie?”

I shifted my weight from foot to foot, suddenly feeling awkward and out of place. What was I doing here, showing up at Shepherd's BDSM club in the middle of the day like some kind of desperate stalker?

“I, um... I'm looking for Shepherd,” I stammered out, my voice rough from crying. “Is he here?”

The woman's gaze softened as she took in my red-rimmed eyes and the dried tear tracks on my cheeks. “Oh honey, you look like you've had a rough day. Why don't you come inside and we'll get you sorted out, okay?”

She opened the door wider, ushering me into the dim interior of the club. I hesitated for a moment before stepping over thethreshold, the cool air hitting my skin like a balm after the oppressive heat outside.

“I'm Life, by the way,” the woman said as she led me down a narrow hallway, her platform boots clicking against the polished concrete floor. “I run this place with Shepherd.”

I mumbled out my own name, but it sounded weak and thready to my own ears. I felt like a husk of myself, hollowed out by desperation and despair.

Life guided me into a small office, the walls lined with bookshelves crammed with titles likeThe New Topping BookandScrew the Roses, Send Me the Thorns. She gestured for me to take a seat on the plush velvet couch.

I sank onto the couch, the luxurious fabric enveloping me like a comforting hug. Life bustled around the small office, her movements graceful and efficient despite her towering heels.

“Let me get you something to drink, sweetie. You look like you could use it.” She pulled open a mini fridge tucked under the desk, rummaging through the contents. “We've got water, juice, soda... I think there might even be some iced tea in here somewhere.”

My throat felt like sandpaper, my tongue thick and heavy in my mouth. “Water's fine.”

Life handed me an icy bottle, the cold plastic a shock against my overheated skin. I twisted off the cap with shaking hands, the water sloshing over my fingers as I brought it to my lips. It was the best thing I'd ever tasted, the cool liquid soothing my raw throat as I gulped it down greedily.

“Easy there, tiger,” Life said with a gentle laugh. “Don't want you making yourself sick.” She perched on the edge of the desk, watching me with concern in her warm brown eyes. “When's the last time you ate something? You're looking a little peaky.”

I shrugged, avoiding her gaze. The truth was, I couldn't remember. Yesterday, maybe? Everything was a blur.

Life must have seen the answer on my face, because she nodded and pulled open one of the desk drawers. “I've got some protein bars in here. They're not gourmet, but they'll do in a pinch.” She tossed a couple onto the couch beside me. “Eat up. I can't have you passing out on my watch.”

I picked up one of the bars, my fingers fumbling with the shiny wrapper. Chocolate Peanut Butter. The scent hit me as soon as I tore it open, rich and sweet. My stomach growled loudly, reminding me how long it had been since I'd had anything substantial.

I devoured the first bar in three bites, barely tasting it. The second I ate more slowly, savoring the way the chocolate melted on my tongue, the chunky peanut butter sticking to the roof of my mouth. It wasn't much, but it took the edge off the gnawing emptiness in my gut.

Life watched me eat, her perfectly shaped eyebrows drawn together in a slight frown. “Poor dear. How do you know Shepherd?”

I swallowed the last bite of the protein bar, my tongue darting out to lick a smear of chocolate from the corner of my mouth. Life's question hung in the air between us, heavy with unspoken implications.

How did I know Shepherd? It was a loaded question, one I wasn't sure how to answer. The truth was, I barely knew him at all. We'd met only once, over coffee, where he'd offered to be my mentor, my dom. An offer I'd been too overwhelmed and confused to accept in the moment.

But now, sitting here in his club, surrounded by the trappings of his world, I realized that Shepherd was the closest thing I had to a lifeline. A tenuous connection, yes, but the only one I had left.

I took a deep breath, meeting Life's curious gaze. “He... he offered to help me.”

Understanding dawned on Life's face, followed by a flicker of something that might have been concern. She pulled out her cell phone, hit a button, and put it to her ear. “Shepherd? It’s Life. No, the paperwork is fine. I’ve got a young man here looking for you by the name of…” She covered the phone and leaned forward. “What’s your name, sweetie?”

I swallowed, cheeks warming. “Eli.”

“Eli is here looking for you,” she continued, speaking into the phone. “The poor boy looks like he’s walked through a war zone to get here.” Life listened for a moment, then nodded. “Will do. See you soon.” She ended the call and slipped the phone back into her pocket. “Shepherd's on his way. He said to make you comfortable and he'll be here as soon as he can.” She gave me a reassuring smile. “Don't you worry, honey. We'll get this all sorted out.”

I slumped back against the couch cushions, relief and exhaustion hitting me like a tidal wave. Shepherd was coming. He would know what to do, how to fix this mess I'd gotten myself into.

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