Page 87 of Heal Me

"Someday, Amelia," he sighs, "someday," and begins to laugh.

Danylo sends another SMS. Only the ten thousandth time after my OK.

Danylo:I know that you avoid me. By the way, not very professionally. Just admit that you don't want to see me and go back to the internship, I won't bother you anymore.

My heart bleeds. I feel like I killed his cat, and I'm hiding it from him. I don't know what to answer him. I don't know what words to choose. I like spending time with him. Even more than just like. This is the problem.

Me:It's about me. This is not for me. And not for you too. You will soon have a child, be a good father.

I send a text while mentally burning my phone. I don't know why my heart reacts to him like that. I don't know why I am in pain now and why I want to see Danylo again.

Danylo:What the hell is that supposed to mean, Amelia?

"Are you listening to me?"

"So what? " I finally remember that Sebastian is sitting across from me.

"What's wrong with you? You and Danylo are so strange lately."

"And what about Danylo? Have you seen him? How is he?"

"I saw him in the other day with Zlata," Sebastian smiles and licks the ice cream spoon, I hate when he does that,"I swear, they are the cutest couple in the world."Nausea.

Everything I've eaten for the past few days seems to be about to come out. Now, not only the heart hurts, but also the stomach.

Somebody shoot me right in the brain.

"Yes," I finally squeeze out, "they are really cute."

"What about you? Do you want to try to move on?"

It's hard to move on when your feet are tied to the ground and your heart belongs to another person.

"I left the engagement ring on Denys's grave," I swallow hard.

"Wow," Sebastian is surprised, "you never took it off. That's a big step, Ami." He touches my hand. "I’m always here for you, you know that." "I know," I hold my brother's hand, but my body squeezes harder.

If someone asked me now to point to the place where it hurts, I wouldn't be able to decide. It hurts everywhere. Absolutely everywhere.

"By the way, I saw Louis the other day," these words fly out of Sebastian's mouth and resonate deeply inside me.

I didn't see Denys's brother after the heart transplant. I know his family loved me too much to blame me, but I couldn't find the strength to keep in touch with them.

Louis and Denys are a copy of each other. I couldn't just look at him and hide the fact that my heart wasn't breaking from the pain inside me.

"Louis?" I finally speak, my voice is raspy, so I clear my throat.

"Yes, he stayed in a hotel in Kyiv a week ago, said that he came on business and will soon return to Lviv."

Does Sebastian really feel nothing when he talks so easily about my dead fiancé's brother, or is he so skilfully hiding his feelings?

If the second option, then I envy him. Although even if it's the first, I'm jealous in any case. I would also like to talk about it easily. "He asked about you." My blood is cold.

"What exactly?" my gaze is lowered, I cannot look my brother in the eyes, I am afraid that he will read everything that is written in them now.

Pain. Despair. Self-destruction.

"He asked how you feel, whether you are studying in college, different things."