Page 64 of Heal Me

I know he's lying. Danylo clenches his jaw. Every time he does this, he's either annoyed or confused.

"You look tired."

"I am."

Danylo walks over to the window sill. I do the same.

"I am confused. I love Zlata, but this pregnancy and this wedding, everything is driving me crazy. She's six months pregnant, I found out a month ago, but our parents just found out now. They want this wedding, not us."

Sixth. Month. Pregnancy.

"This is normal. Everyone gets excited before a wedding, and even more so when they know they are going to become a father."

"I'm going to be a father," Danylo repeats quietly, "this is probably the first time I've realised I'm going to be a father," Danylo said, emphasising the words.

"I think there is nothing more beautiful than a child from the woman you love."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," he agreed, not quite sure what to make of it.

"Everything will be fine, you'll manage."

"I don't know." Danylo groans and buries his face in his hands. "This is all so hard."

I put my hand on his shoulder.

"Have you ever fallen in love with someone other than Denys?" With you.

But I just shake my head. The last thing Danylo needs to know is that I'm in love with him.

Desperately.

Hopelessly. Devastatingly.

In love with him.

"No, and I don't think I'll ever be able to fall in love again."

"Even if there is a man who falls madly in love with you?"

"I can give him everything, children, joy, happiness, but not love, and it's impossible to live with someone knowing that they will never love you back."

"Why are you so sure of this? That you will never love again?" Because I’m lying.

"Because I know myself."

Because I don't want to destroy your family, Danylo.

"Will Denys be always present in your life? I mean, you'll never be able to forget him?" He looks me straight in the eyes, making sure I'm not lying.

He studies my face, studies my light green eyes, which are looking at him intently.

"Never. And even if I ever meet my love, I still won't love anyone more than Denys."

I know that my words are destroying him. I stab him in his heart and cry desperately inside. But I will not take them back. I will not destroy his family.

Danylo doesn't answer. I don't know what the point of this conversation was, but I can see that he is relieved.

So we get up and finally start working.

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