Page 31 of Wolf Lost

He turned back to look at Gavin, still sitting on the chair sipping his beer. He raised it to Dez in salute and smiled, but neither of them were fooled. Clearly, Gavin needed as much help as Dez. Maybe he’d agree to see a therapist if Gavin would.

But also, maybe werewolves seeing a therapist was the worst idea ever. “You see, Doctor, sometimes I turn into a furry creature of the night and run around the mountain.”

He shook his head. It was a problem for another night. A night when the breeze wasn’t ruffling his fur, the moon wasn’t shining down on him and his pack like a benevolent protector, and Dez wasn’t more interested in catching the rabbit he could smell somewhere ahead than talking about feelings.

So maybe never.

* * *

Every part of Dez ached,and it was the best feeling he’d had in ages.

They had run beneath the moon, through the trees, up and down the mountain. He suspected he’d pay for the excessive use of muscles he hadn’t worked out in months even if it had been as a wolf, but it would be worth it. He wasn’t finished yet, either.

He chased Sawyer right past an amused-looking Gavin and into the house. Sure, Sawyer could outrun him in a second, given Dez’s awkward gait, but Sawyer wasn’t trying to outrun him.

Without any hesitation, Sawyer turned not toward his own green bedroom, but Dez’s gray one.

He slowed as Sawyer did, the other wolf turning to stare Dez in the eye challengingly for a moment before sauntering into Dez’s room like he belonged there.

Dez so wanted him to belong there. But a tiny part of him hesitated, turning back to Asher, still chasing a rabbit out in the woods. To Gavin, sitting alone with his thoughts.

“We’ll be fine,” Gavin said over his own shoulder. His voice was quiet, but no doubt Sawyer could hear it too, those wolf ears sharper than a human’s. “If that’s what you’re worried about. Ash and I aren’t worried or offended by the idea of half the pack pairing off. Most important thing is that you’re happy. Both of you.”

Dez inclined his head as best he could in his wolf form as he felt the last vestiges of hesitation fall away.

His brothers would be fine if he were in a relationship. Eventually they would find relationships of their own, since they were all free to date now.

Sawyer wanted him, and not as a magically healed version of himself, but as he was. Even before Afghanistan, Dez had never met someone who wanted him as he was.

Everything was right in ways Dez couldn’t have expected or asked for. He’d expected Ash to end up married at some point, and maybe even Gavin, but he’d never imagined that he’d find someone who would put up with his sullen, glaring self.

He paused in the doorway of his bedroom, bemusedly watching as Sawyer, still a wolf, rolled around on his bed, laying down a thick coat of his scent. He was marking the bed, and more importantly, Dez’s personal territory, with himself. Maybe it would have been a bigger deal if Dez had been born a wolf, but then again, maybe not. There was something exhilarating about being claimed so blatantly.

Sawyer wanted him. Wanted to belong in his room, to be a part of his territory. Dez had no illusions about why most men in his past had slept with him. He was good looking and in excellent shape. Perfect for a one-night stand, but no one wanted the surly personality that went with the muscles and jawline.

But Sawyer hopped up to all fours on the middle of Dez’s bed, tongue lolling out in a canine grin, and then slid back into his human skin as easily as breathing.

The look on the man’s face was considerably less playful than the look on the wolf’s had been. His brown eyes smoldered, staring Dez down, as though he found him sexy even as a big black wolf. Maybe he did. He’d been adamant that wolf and man weren’t separate entities, and that made sense.

Sort of like being bisexual. Bisexuals weren’t a straight person and a gay one shoved into a single skin. They were one being with multiple attractions. Dez was both man and wolf, always, no matter which side he was showing at the time.

And Sawyer seemed to like both sides quite a lot.

“Changing back is easier,” Sawyer said as he lowered himself down to sit cross-legged, blithe and naked, there on Dez’s bed. The casualness was affected, since his cock was hard and ready, jutting up obscenely, but Sawyer was ignoring it better than Dez was. “It’s the form you’re used to having. Your body knows it. Just let it bring you back.”

Dez went to the edge of the bed and looked up at Sawyer for a moment.

This was it.

If he changed back, everything changed.

He snorted aloud at his own thoughts. Everything had already changed two months earlier, when the army had sent their unit into a death trap against an ancient alpha werewolf on his own territory. Dez hadn’t had a choice in that change and had ended up disabled and a newly bitten werewolf. This change was a no-brainer. This was a change he wanted.

He closed his eyes and concentrated on his usual two-legged form. The feeling of the solid hardwood floor beneath his human feet. The way Sawyer’s skin would feel against his.

The change disoriented him for a moment, growing multiple feet taller in a few seconds, but when he reopened his eyes, everything was familiar and comfortable.

“Knew you’d be able to do it,” Sawyer whispered. He drifted forward a few inches, as though he were being pulled toward Dez.

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