Page 21 of Wolf Lost

No, the problem was the hand. It wasn’t constant and predictable like his leg. It was random and interfered with his basic ability to do the job.

Gavin, thankfully, didn’t recommend that they simply buy a new case. He seemed to understand it was important that Dez make it. Dez didn’t know why it was important, but it was.

Asher had guilelessly suggested he become ambidextrous, like that was a simple choice a guy could make. He’d done it, after all, couldn’t everyone?

Sawyer did what he could to help, but it ended up turning into a three-man job because Dez couldn’t swing a damned hammer reliably. Neither Sawyer nor Asher complained, because of course they didn’t. In fact, they were both apologetic about their limitations, as though they were the ones who’d been trained to build things and were failing.

It was a little ironic if a person thought about it. During high school, Dez had done an apprenticeship with a carpenter, learning how to create things. Then immediately after, he’d joined the army, and learned how to destroy.

His hand spasmed, and he dropped the vise he was demonstrating to Sawyer. He had to turn away to keep from cursing when it landed on his foot. It wasn’t that big. It didn’t hurt that much.

It wasn’t about that.

Somehow, it had taken Sawyer less time to get used to Dez’s anger at himself than Ash and Gavin. In fact, despite the way Sawyer had acted upon first learning about Dez’s leg, he seemed to have adjusted to reality better than any of the rest of the pack.

Probably because Sawyer hadn’t known him as a viciously competent sniper, only a somewhat competent carpenter who dropped things constantly and then cursed under his breath.

“Hey guys, sorry, I had to make sure the kitchen layout was right,” Ash said breathlessly, coming in from the kitchen and looking like he’d just had amazing sex. Dez didn’t think there had ever been another person who couldn’t cook, who was that excited about having a state-of-the-art restaurant kitchen.

He was starting his baking classes at the local rec center on Wednesday night, a fact he was equally excited about. They were starting with brownies, he kept telling them all. He’d be able to make all the brownies they wanted.

Dez wasn’t going to complain. If he was going to indulge in sweets, it was going to be chocolate, every time.

He might get fat now that he couldn’t jog. Oh well.

Instead of obsessing, he sighed and motioned to the vise. “You know how to work one, right?”

“Sure!” Ash agreed brightly. “And we’re putting it on what?”

Slowly, Dez talked him through the process. It felt ridiculous and unwieldy, talking about it instead of doing the job himself, but Sawyer and Ash were smart guys, and learned quickly enough. His left hand was also still functional, even if it wasn’t as strong or steady as his right was supposed to be.

“So what’s up with you and the kitchen?” Sawyer asked Ash, after they’d learned the task and it no longer required complete concentration. “I mean, every time you talk about it, I would swear you pop a freaking knot.”

Ash, who had been in the process of nailing in a joist, lost his aim and smashed his finger with the hammer instead. He dropped the hammer and danced around a little, waving his hand out, and Sawyer watched him with a bemused expression.

“You okay?”

Dez figured this was where he came in, since Ash was trying very hard not to look at anyone, staring at the hammer as he picked it back up, and then continuing to look past it to the floor.

So he figured he’d smack his own nail on the head.

“What the hell does pop a knot mean?”

That was when three things happened at once. Asher flinched and dropped the hammer again. Sawyer turned to stare at Dez with wide, shocked eyes. And Gavin walked through the front door and froze, staring at them in shock.

“What doeswhatmean?” Gavin asked, voice strained.

Dez realized with no small amount of annoyance that literally every single person in the room knew more about the subject than he did. He pointed at Gavin. “What do you know?”

Gavin swallowed and coughed before stammering—and that was the damn weirdest thing ever—“It’s, uh, it’s a thing. A sex thing. That dogs get.”

“Also wolves,” Sawyer added.

Ash buried his face in his hands, and Dez wouldn’t have been shocked if he were crying. Dez kind of wanted to join him, but he thought in this case he needed to err in favor of getting more information.

“And by wolves, I assume you also mean us?” Dez asked. When Sawyer nodded, eyes still wide, Dez turned to Asher. “When exactly were you planning on mentioning this?”

“Um.”

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