Page 30 of Finding the Pieces

“Yeah, you know…thegoods,” I reiterate.

“You’re making it sound shady,” Dylan says. “But yeah, I brought thegoods,” he says with mirth, taking an envelope out of his back pocket and throwing it on the table. Luca’s eyes widen and he starts crawling in earnest to steal the exciting piece of paper. I swear, we have a thousand toys in this house, and he acts like he’d rather play with an envelope, a spatula, or a remote control. If we had known that, we could have saved some money. Thanks for nothing, Fisher-Price.

I quickly grab the envelope before Luca can swipe it and verify said goods are inside before holding out an expectant palm to the rest of the guys.

Chris, Jake, and Aiden slowly reach into whichever pocket they put the small pieces I need for this all to work.

God, I need this to work.

“Dom,” Chris says, eyes locked on mine. “I need you to know that this might be the most romantic gesture I’ve ever witnessed.”

“Hey,” Jake says defensively.

“And as your brother-in-law, I want to see you succeed,” Chris continues. “But I also need you to be careful.”

Huh? Be careful with what?

“Yeah, he’s right,” Aiden agrees. “You need to think about how you’re going tell Ellie about this.”

“Guys, I appreciate whatever it is you’re trying to do here, because it seems like your hearts are in the right place, and I’m grateful for your help, but let me put your minds at ease. I know my wife. I’ve seen this woman at her lowest of lows and highest of highs. I know her fears, I know her dreams, and I make it my responsibility to memorize every shift in those as we walk through life together. I’m the man she’s trusted to keep her safe. I’m the man who promised to love her and give her every bit of happiness she deserves in this life. I’m not going to stop doing those things until I stop breathing.”

“Damn, can I get that engraved on a ring?” Aiden asks quietly.

“We’re just saying,” Dylan adds with an unusual softness in his voice. “That it might not go exactly how you expect.”

“Ellie’s been through a lot, Dominic,” Jake says, full-naming me, for fuck’s sake.

“You’re acting as if I don’t know that,” I retort.As if I wasn’t fucking there.

Now I’m annoyed. This is supposed to be a good thing. Why are they saying this shit like I’m about to hurt Ellie instead of help her? This is all supposed to help her. Help us too.

“I don’t mean anything by it,” Jake says, leaning back in his chair, worry evident in his expression. “But what you guys went through…you can’t fix it with games and romantic gestures. It takes more than that.”

“I know what it’s going to take,” I say, bile rising in my throat, because…fuck,they might be right. “Look, this is just something I need to try, okay?” Even I can hear the uncertainty as my voice breaks.

Am I doing what I always do? Using big gestures, plans, and gifts to try to fill the void of something bigger? Something that can’t be fixed without burning it all down to the stumps first? Fuck, maybe I am.

“I’ll be careful when I tell her. Now, if you’re done trying to lecture me out of my great idea, I’ll take the rest of your pieces now,” I say with a grin, trying to will away the awkward concern reflected back at me with every bit of false confidence I can muster.

Because if I don’t believe this will work, then it won’t. And I refuse to sit by and watch my wife fade away. This is how I bring her back; I can feel it.

Chapter fourteen

Ellie

“Baby’s heart rate is…”

Baby’s heart rate is what?

“Three, two, one, lift…”

FUCK.Pain, searing pain shoots from my pelvis, through my abdomen, and all I can do is scream.

“Ellie, I need you to breathe…”

I can’t…I can’t…I can’t breathe…

Someone pulls my arms roughly, pressing them hard against the table beneath me, but I resist, pulling and screaming, unable to focus on anything other than the excruciating pain and panic sweeping over me, crashing against every inch of my body and mind. The urgency in the voices around me doesn’t calm me, it has the opposite effect, and my fight response kicks in.

---