Page 45 of Winning the Nightcap

Ellie:All the options you sent us earlier look incredible on you. Wear what makes you feel good.

Bec:I don’t know…maybe this is a sign. I should probably cancel.

* * *

Ellie’s photo pops up on the screen as my phone rings. I should have known she wouldn’t let me hide behind text messages.

“What’s got you second-guessing this?” Ellie asks, skipping greetings altogether.

I’m short on time. Aiden said he’d be here in thirty minutes, so I need to figure out quickly if I’m chickening out on this date.

“Last night…I got a call—” I begin to say.

“From Josh? That fucking asshole,” Ellie mutters. “You guys broke up six months ago. What is his problem?”

“We don’t know that he was going to be an asshole. He didn’t get a chance to say anything. I didn’t answer, and he didn’t leave a voice mail.”This time.

“Bec, we both know he was going to be an asshole. What time did he call you?”

I hesitate for a few moments before I answer her, knowing it’s as shitty as it sounds. “Two in the morning…”

“Jesus, fuck that guy. Tell him to lose your goddamn number. No, wait, you shouldn’t even have to do that. Can we block him or something? I know you were hoping that wouldn’t be necessary, but clearly this is getting under your skin. Are you okay?”

I half giggle to keep the hysteria down. “Uh, no. Not really. I didn’t want to have to do it, but I did finally block his number this morning when I woke up and saw the call.”

“Fuck yeah, girl. I’m proud of you. I know that’s not easy.”

“I think if I’m being honest with myself, it was easy.” My heart doesn’t ache anymore when I see the missed calls in the morning. The sting of rejection is muted, though the insecurities it fed still linger. “I don’t know why I waited this long. I think I was waiting for him to prove he was still the nice guy I met when we started dating, or maybe I was waiting for validation from him that I was good enough. Anyway, I’m tired of seeing his missed calls and being reminded of everything he claims I’m missing. But what if…what if Aiden feels the same way when he gets to know me better.” I hate hearing the self-doubt in my voice.

“First of all, you’re not lacking. Josh was too stupid to see howwonderful you are, but that doesn’t mean Aiden is anything like him. I don’t think it’s even a possibility that Aiden will feel the same way about you. He was over the other night with the guys to watch the game, and this date clearly means a lot to him. Of course, I told him if he hurts you, he’ll have to watch his fucking back.”

“Are we threatening six-foot-three, two-hundred-and-twenty-five-pound professional athletes now?” I tease.

“Nice stats recall, babe. Are we googling the shit out of your crush now?” I can practically hear the shit-eating grin I know she’s wearing.

Busted.

“Imighthave looked him up online. For research purposes, obviously.”

“Obviously,” Ellie says with a laugh.

“I didn’t understand any of the stats they listed other than his height and weight. Wouldn’t he be a better fit with someone who’s obsessed with baseball or something? What if he loses interest when the rose-colored glasses of a new fling fade away and he hates what he sees in me?”

“When you talk to Aiden, are you looking for flaws or are you too busy discovering reasons to like him? I think you should stop looking for reasons that this won’t work and enjoy yourself. You’ve gotta stop picking yourself apart.”

“Easier said than done.”

“I know, babe. But do me a favor and give it a try. One date, right? Give him one date before you decide on the next one. The way he was talking about you the other night when he was over with the guys…I don’t know, I can tell this is different. I know it’s hard to put yourself out there, but you deserve to be with someone who sees how special you are. Who’s to say that guy isn’t Aiden? How will you ever know unless you give him a chance?”

“If he’s got your approval, then he’ll get his chance. You’re the best,Ellie. I mean it. Love you. Green dress it is.”

“Good choice. Text me if my intuition is wrong and he’s being a douche. If you want to bail, Luca and I will bust you outta there faster than you can believe and we’ll go get ice cream.”

“Nowthatsounds like a good date.”

“Go get ready. Oh…and wear some super-slutty underwear just in case! Okay, loveyoubyyyyye,” she rushes out in one breath before she hangs up. I look down at my phone and laugh.

I get dressed quickly and touch up my makeup with just enough time to check my hair in the mirror before I hear the buzzer for my door. Ellie’s right. Aiden hasn’t given me a reason to look for any issues, but trusting someone is daunting when my attempts at relationships always seem to crash and burn eventually. But if I could take the risk on anyone, my heart knows it wants to take that chance on Aiden.

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