Page 69 of Off the Pitch

I didn’t even have to think about my answer. “Yes.”

Chapter Twenty-Nine

WICH WAY NEXT?

As Greenwich crash out of their third competition in a week, we look at what’s going on in East London – Analysis

BBC Sport

Christian

I put my plan into action as soon as I got home.

The first thing I did was text Liam and Jordan, asking them to come around later that afternoon. I couldn’t work out whether to tell them I had something to talk to them about or whether to just invite them for X-box and food. In the end, I chickened out and said neither.

They both agreed, though.

I then sent a begging text to Lily, asking her to please come home and sit with me instead of spending time at the library. It worked, but I did have to explain why. She was still barely speaking to me, but I was hoping this would help. At some point, I’d probably have to explain my full emotional revelation to her, but for now all I had to do was agree to go to one of her DJ sets that I’d been putting off because I hated clubbing.

I’d probably agree to anything, including swimming with piranhas, if it meant she’d sit with me while I poured my heart out to my teammates. A large part of me said that I was being ridiculous. The small but very vocal other part said I was being perfectly reasonable in wanting her there.

The vocal part won.

By the time Liam and Jordan both arrived, I’d been pacing for half an hour and wondering whether I was going to vomit. Lily looked like she was about to throttle me.

“Mate, you okay?” Jordan asked, pulling me in for a hug as he stepped into the house.

“Yeah, fine,” I said, although it was obvious even to me that I was lying.

“Is this about yesterday?” Liam asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No, well, maybe… not really. I don’t know.” I sighed. A small, exasperated laugh slipped through my lips as I ran my fingers through my hair. I was not being nearly as calm and collected as I’d hoped. “Let’s just sit down. Do you want a drink?”

They both shook their heads, concern clear on their faces as they followed me into the living room where Lily was waiting.

I’d hoped the conversation would flow once we were all settled, but instead, there was silence. Horrible, uncomfortable silence. I could feel them all staring at me, so I focused my eyes on the floor.

“Christian,” said Liam eventually. “What’s going on?”

“Are you leaving Greenwich?” Jordan asked.

“No,” I said, shaking my head. “No, nothing like that.”

“Is it Trossero? Did you get torn out?”

“No.”

“Did someone get hurt?” Liam tried again, his voice soft as if he was worried I might explode at any moment.

“Sort of. I mean, I hurt someone.” This wasn’t going to get any easier, and the conversation was already heading down a darker path than I’d intended since Liam seemed to think someone was dead.

“I have something to tell you,” I started, chewing on my lip. “And I really hope it won’t change our friendship.”

“Mate, nothing could do that.” The eyeroll was evident in Jordan’s voice.

“I’m gay.”

There was a moment of silence.

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