Page 175 of Deliverance

But the fucking seed had been planted.

Stevie plucks at his guitar strings and my memories fade.

Minutes tick by as we wait, light chatter filling the room. Eventually, Luca rises up from his chair and stretches. Jacob disappears, probably to get more food. Dude eats for five. Toby pours himself a cup of coffee and continues to pretend things are fine.

Only, things aren’t fine. Because I feel personally responsible for making sure the cover is done right.

Half an hour later, when Leo’s still not back, I shoot up to my feet and head for the door.

“Let him cool off, Shaw,” Toby calls.

I want to tell him to suck his own dick, because his pacifistic behavior grinds my gears, but my mouth opens and then closes. It’s none of my business—giving him advice on how to be a better friend, but I’m sick and tired of these guys simply kicking back and watching one of their own going down a dark fucking path, a path that never leads anywhere good.

I march along the empty corridor that’s lined by closed doors and step outside. Leo’s truck is still in the parking lot. The sun is low, streaks of blood-red spilling over the roofs of the vehicles and licking the glass windows of the buildings rising a few blocks ahead.

I turn around and survey my surroundings. The property is tucked behind a large shopping center with access through the back alley, and there’s not a single soul in sight, just the distant hum of the street.

The door swings open with a loud bang and Stevie walks out. Leaning against the wall, he plucks his smokes and a lighter from the front pocket of his jacket and offers a cigarette to me, but I decline.

“Thanks. I’ll pass, man.”

That’s one shitty habit I’ve never understood and never will.

He shrugs and lights up.

We stand like this, speechless and a little agitated, for a few moments, until he finally says, “When I got offered to play with the guys, Toby had a sit-down with me. He said if I ever brought up Athena, we’d have to part ways.”

“Is that so?” I lock my eyes on Stevie’s and watch him lazily push the smoke out through his nostrils.

“Yep.” He nods. “True story, bro.”

“I got one for you too,” I say, my voice harsh and ugly, my pulse pounding in my ears. “I had a friend once, who was into all kinds of shit, and then he died in front of me because we were afraid to speak up.”

Stevie glares at me like I just sprouted a fifth limb, his cigarette dangling from his lips, limp.

“How’s that for a story about parting ways? Huh?” I scoff and head inside. There’s a roar in my head because I’ve never said that out loud in front of a person I hardly know. Fuck, I don’t ever say it out loud in front of my friends and family, but the indifference toward what’s going on with Leo is driving me mad.

Turning the corner, I enter the restroom, approach the sink, and splash cold water on my face, needing to soothe the burn that’s ravaging my body. Heaviness presses against my chest, thick and throbbing. My vision blurs as I stare at the stream corking its way down the drain, and my shriveling lungs are suddenly missing air.

I only see it by pure accident. In the reflection in the mirror. The beat-up tip of his boot flashing at me from beneath the short stall door. Heart in my throat, I swirl and take a step forward, then drag my hand over my wet face.

“Leo?” There’s a wobble in my voice.

He doesn’t move.

I panic and slap my palm against the door. It flings open, revealing Leo’s body. He’s sitting on the tiled floor, one elbow propped on the shut toilet lid, head pressed to the wall. His phone rests in his lap, screen up.

“Man, what’s going on?” I take inventory of everything I’m seeing, unsure what to do or say next. “You need help?” I extend my hand, but he waves me off.

“Nah. I’m good.” A lazy smile spreads across his lips.

“Are you high?” I ask, locking my gaze on his and noting his dilated pupils.

“Last time.” He tips his chin to his chest. “Promise.”

I’ve heard that song before. I know how it goes. “Are you fucking serious right now?” Rage swirls through my gut, and higher—up, up, up—until it hits me right into the solar plexus.

Leo releases a shuddering sigh, so substantial that, for a moment, it feels like the air itself cracks and catches on fire inside this room.

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