Page 77 of Severance

My heart jumps into my throat when I see the downstairs lights in our house beaming bright from all the way down the street.

“Can you just drop me off here?” I ask Dakota in a panic.

“You’re not walking at night alone.” He throws a glance of disapproval at me and steps on the gas. His car is insanely loud and doesn’t belong in this neighborhood. The worst part is that I already know that even if my father is fast asleep, a mad roar like this will wake him up.

The Mustang crawls down the snow white street like a locomotive through the wilderness of Antarctica. It’s late and most of the neighborhood is dark. When we pull into my driveway, Dakota puts the gear in neutral and turns down the music.

“Thank you for today,” he turns to me and whispers.

There’s a war raging inside me. I want to kiss him goodbye badly, but I’m also scared my father might be watching us, and a lengthy lecture about my virtue is not something I want to hear tonight…or ever.

“I loved it. Thank you for taking me,” I say breathlessly, unfastening my seatbelt. “And thank you for the pizza.”

Dakota leans over and slides his hand to the back of my neck to pull me in for a kiss. I don’t want to put on a late night show for my parents, but he’s too hard to resist. Every bone in my body longs for him physically and emotionally, and I wish I felt more certain that my mother and father and all my friends would accept him for all his quirks.

Our lips crash together and mesh into one hot and relentless slow dance. The kind that owns you completely.

“I’ll miss you,” Dakota says against my mouth as we break the kiss.

“I’ll miss you too.” The words just come out. I don’t think about whether they’re right or too soon. It’s how I feel and I say it.

“All right, get some rest. I’ll text you tomorrow.”

I slip out of the car and rush to the front door. He waits until I make it inside before pulling out of the driveway.

“Alana?” My mother’s voice drifts at me when she steps out of the kitchen as I’m on my way upstairs.

“Hey.” I muster up a smile.

“Who’s the young man?” she asks, her eyes studying me carefully, probably looking for clues I’ve done something wrong.

“Ummm…just someone I met.” I do my best to sound indifferent, but I don’t believe staying calm while talking about Dakota is possible in my universe.

“In college?”

“No.” I shake my head.

“Is it something we should discuss with your father?”

“It’s late, Mom,” I groan out. “He just dropped me off. Can we not make a big deal out of it?”

“I’m not making a big deal out of it, but if you’re going to see him again, I think it would be good if we discuss this all together.”

My frustration grows so huge that I want to bang my head against the wall. “Who I see isn’t your decision to make, Mom. You either have to accept it or not.” My voice cracks and deep down, I feel bad for saying it out loud to her.

“Get some rest. We’ll talk tomorrow.” She offers me a tired smile.

I don’t ask her about the trip to Vancouver. I charge for my room before my father makes an appearance.

21. After

I have no idea what’s happened between Mikah and me.

I’m convinced he has his own time measuring system. A few days has turned into weeks, two groggy late-night phone calls and stingy texts that stopped coming in five days ago. That’s after he fucked me until I passed out.

My father’s right. All guys want is sex. Maybe God took Dakota because he was different. Because he was too good for this life.

“Alana? What a nice surprise to see you here.” Mrs. Kaminski’s voice jars me back to reality.

---