Page 26 of Forget About Me

“I guess so. I hadn’t thought about that.”

I look around the park. “Maybe what we need is to get him to follow you while you talk using a big range of feeling.” I gesture back in the direction of the parking lot. “We’ll run out of light soon, so let’s head back. Along the way, just say whatever, but use all the emotions you can.”

“Alright, but no laughing at me.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be funny in this play?”

He narrows his eyes at me for a half a moment before pulling the muscles of his face down, turning his perfectly sculpted features into a goofy mask. Then he drops his hands and shakes his whole body as he makes some very odd noises. In response, Puck drops into a play bow, front legs spread wide, tail in the air. When he barks, Ben stops wiggling and mirrors Puck. Slapping his thigh, man takes off and dog follows.

All the way down the hill, Ben morphs from one extreme to another. It’s like watching Looney Tunes.

When I catch up to them, Ben straightens so that he seems even taller than usual and wags a finger at me. “No laughing, missy!” He says this in a falsetto, like a school marm.

My hands go up in the air. “I’m not laughing.”

He makes a face at me before stomping away. The madder he gets, the funnier he is. Forgetting all about the job I’m here to perform, I end up in a game of Mother, may I? with him, unsuccessfully stifling my giggles when he catches me moving.

By the time we get back to the car, I’m howling with laughter. Ben drops the character he’s been playing, but his smile is golden. “That was the most fun I’ve had in a long time.”

Yeah. Me too.

Back in the car, Ben reaches over to change the station on the radio, leaving NPR behind. When he finds a music station, he turns up the volume. The drive back is short, but he gets me laughing again when he sings along with The Pointer Sisters’ “He’s So Shy” in a falsetto even higher-pitched than the one he used earlier. Maybe the goofball I knew and loved hasn’t completely disappeared.

When I pull up in front of his dad’s house and put the car into park, I’m grinning as I shake my head at him. “You’re a nut.”

He shrugs, likewhat can I say?After collecting Puck from the backseat, he leans back in the window and lets out an enormous sigh. Nodding slowly, he says, “Thank you, Lucy. That was—I needed that.”

This time I say it. “Yeah. Me too.”

He gives me a little salute, slaps his thigh, and heads up the driveway. Watching him go, I let the music wash over me, something I haven’t done in a very long time.

After Ben left for LA, I spiraled out of control for a while. That made things even worse, so I swung to the other extreme. I went back to church and quit all the bad behaviors that got me into trouble in the first place. But I don’t remember deciding to stop listening to music. Singing along with a mixtape of my favorites doesn’t hurt anybody, as long as I don’t sing too loudly.

Plus, I’m a good girl now. I may be fantasizing about Ben, but I’m working hard and taking care of my family. I could probably do more good in the world—join the Peace Corps or something—but I’m doing the best I can.

Instead of turning back to the news, I turn the music up for the short trip home. I would dig out one of my old mixtapes, but I gave all the best ones to Ben.

CHAPTER NINE

"I Want You to Want Me" - Cheap Trick

Lucy’s Copacetic Shagadelic Mixtape, Song #5

LUCY

The next morning, I hold out my hand for Mrs. O’Neill as she steps out of the confessional. The elderly woman is a force of nature, running half of the committees at Saint Bonaventure’s, but she looks a bit wobbly at the moment. “Thank you, dear. I must have stood up too quickly.”

“Do you need me to walk you to your car?”

“Gina’s waiting for me. We’ll walk home together.”

Across the dim chapel, Mrs. Rinaldi waves from near the doorway. Mrs. O’Neill is surefooted as she heads in her direction and other people are waiting, so I step into the box, close the door and open the screen.

“Bless me, Father for I have sinned. It’s been one week since my last confession. These are my sins. I yelled at one brother because he left his clean laundry in the middle of the floor and the other brother because he left the paper we’d worked so hard on at home and got his grade docked. I took the Lord’s name in vain when I was driving to work and a man cut me off, and I used profanity when a cat scratched me at work.”

Silence from the other side of the screen. Instead of the gentle scolding I usually receive, I hear, “Mm.”

And more silence.

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