Page 7 of Ink Deep Devotion

I laid in bed and closed my eyes, but all I heard were the cries of the guys who used to sit in the cafeteria with us.

Will I cry like them as I’m dying?

As I look up, I see Leo with a fresh black eye on his face. He and Anders are always arguing, but everything changes once we step onto the battlefield. Watching them work together is a bizarre sight; they’re so in sync that they don’t need words. But inside the school, I worry they’ll suffocate each other.

“Just ignore Anders,” I suggest.

“Not when he mentions my sister.”

“He asked what you thought she was doing.” I roll my eyes. We ask silly questions to ourselves, clinging onto false hopes,unsure if our families are alive or dead. Anders like’s to pester Leo about his sister.

“Her name shouldn’t be on his tongue.”

“What did they fuck or something?”

With a growl, Leo’s fist tightens around his weapon.“Or something,” he quietly hisses.

We work in silence, the tiredness from not sleeping weighs down on my eyelids.“Anders slept,” I remark.“He can always fall asleep.”

What’s his trick?

“At first,” Leo nods.

“True.” No matter the hell we see, Anders always falls asleep with no problem. It’s late at night when his demons wake him. Mine keep me from sleep, so yeah, I’m jealous he gets a few hours of shut-eye.

I’ve grown numb to Anders’s screams. We all have. Dante and Titan try to confront him, but that’s like hugging the tip of a blade. Anders is hurt, and sharp objects like to cut others.

Despite everything, I have a feeling that Anders secretly watches us when he believes we’re not looking. His soulless eyes have a sense of relief when we’re united. I think Anders likes the idea of having a family since his was so fucked up. It’s taken him time to trust us; heck, it’s taken me more time to trust him. The man sleeps with a small hand ax under his pillow.

But he’s killed to keep me alive. We all have done the same.

A laugh escapes me.

“What?” Leo questions.

“Wow, I just remembered the first guy I killed with my bare hands.” Jared. He seems like a lifetime ago. I’ve lost count of how many they have forced me to kill now.

“We always remember the first time we dived into the ocean, and then everything else just becomes murky waters. Some nights, the memories are choppy and restless; other nights, it’s calm, and I remember not one single detail.”

I nod. I feel the same.“You know, I’ve never had time to consider how Jared did it, how he could get so close to Mila.” I was to busy trying to stay alive to even think.

“Jared is the dancer you killed in The Cleansing?” Leo asks. He’s been told the story, but that was shortly after we arrived.

“Yeah,” I mumble as I run my thumb over the side of my gun.

“The scholarship kid?”

I nod.

“Must have been a smart and skilled kid to get as close to Mila as he did.”

“Must have,” I whisper.Perhaps...I shake my head,“I think it’s too much luck. He had to survive alone, dance, and train. Fight good enough to hold his ground with me.” Sure, back then, I wasn’t nearly as good as a killer as I am now.“It’s just…” I run my tongue over my teeth. Jared knew details about Mila’s life that took commitment.

How did he find the time to do everything?

“Yeah. It’s odd.” Leo agrees.“Good thing he’s dead.”

I nod slowly,“Good thing.”

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